The Obligatory CK2 Strange Screenshot Thread

[balmung60]

And u have nothing to do with that ? With that west african reformed ?

With West African Paganism reforming? That I had a good bit to do with (I helped ALL the pagans reform), largely due to helping the Malians take land by exploiting the raiding mechanic to crush the Muslim armies for them until Mali was big enough to start winning on their own. and assassinating Muslim rulers to let them bypass truces.

With him being there? I had nothing to do with that.

 

[Oriflamme]

Should be, actually. Still, the events I got were still about Jesus, Satan, Asmodeus, Lucifer and so on. Interestingly, I got "Jesus gives military advice" three or four times, for a single day each. Dunno why that happened.

I wouldn't want Jesus as my military advisor. He would probably tell me to turn the other cheek or beat my sword into a ploughshare or something like that. Though I suppose that, being a medieval ruler, I could interpret that as "conquer Jerusalem".

 

[firelordzuko]

I wouldn't want Jesus as my military advisor. He would probably tell me to turn the other cheek or beat my sword into a ploughshare or something like that. Though I suppose that, being a medieval ruler, I could interpret that as "conquer Jerusalem".

The modifier actually gives you +20 martial. Jesus apparently was badass.

 

[balmung60]

I wouldn't want Jesus as my military advisor. He would probably tell me to turn the other cheek or beat my sword into a ploughshare or something like that. Though I suppose that, being a medieval ruler, I could interpret that as "conquer Jerusalem".

The modifier actually gives you +20 martial. Jesus apparently was badass.

Little known fact: Jesus's other cheek was covered in spikes.

 

[VoodooEconomist]

The modifier actually gives you +20 martial. Jesus apparently was badass.

Well, the logistic implications of multiplying bread, healing the sick, and turning water into wine... And not to mention, a skilled carpenter is always handy.

 

[firelordzuko]

Well, the logistic implications of multiplying bread, healing the sick, and turning water into wine... And not to mention, a skilled carpenter is always handy.

I like Balmung's explanation better.

 

[Jedrek]

I took this one a long time ago but it still makes me laugh:

In old good CKI time I went crusading as Croatia. At around 1200 the world has seen pope Muhammad Trpimirovic, a half-Arab, half-Croat, born in catholic Tunisia.

 

[duccen]

I see your doge and raise you my satrap. Blind, kinslayer, homosexual, lunatic, drunkard, voice of satan + 6 deadly sins, arbitrary, cruel, craven. That you, Joffrey?

Wow! That's definitely one of the worst characters I've seen for a long time. Must be fun to play as him :happy:

 

[Zedwardson]

Helping me seduce my courtiers, my wife is such a bro.

Well, technically I'm her bro. Half-bro. And the one next to her is my other sister, who is also my concubine and was my father's second wife...
ZOROASTRIANS LEL

Is that feature (to plot to seduce) part of a mod, or something I completely missed in a update?

 

[Kraxis]

Easily happen again... a third time? really? And I would not say at all that iconoclasts and iconodules were mostly just political! Granted, theology basically became what politics were for us...

"The whole city is full of it, the squares, the marketplaces, the crossroads, the alleyways; rag dealers, money-changers, food-sellers, they are busy arguing. If you ask someone to give you change, he philosophizes about the Begotten and the Unbegotten, if you inquire about the price of a loaf, you are told by way of reply that the Father is greater and the Son inferior; if you ask, "Is my bath ready?" the attendant answers that the Son was made out of nothing." - Gregory of Nyssa​

Iconoclasm is one of the most boring heresies in the game though, because they do not have a patriarch and thus cannot follow that old route. I have to manually add a Iconoclast Patriarch!
Personally I feel you are ignoring the theological implications of icons, but I do not understand what you mean when you say " if there were currently both Orthodox and Catholic branches that have a greater difference from the mainstream path, but are still considered wholly within" do you mean churches within the church? So, like you might say that the church under the Moscow Patriarchate has more differences with the church under the Alexandrian Patriarchate, compared to the Orthodox Church and the Iconoclasts?

Yes that would pretty much be it. Like how the Russian Orthodoxy reads the scripture as song and so on, or how the various catholic monastic orders all have their own leanings and doctrines, some of which have historically made them heretical at times.

Yes I know the importance that icons have in Orthodoxy, but remove the icons and it is pretty much still the same religion. It isn't as if the basic philosophy changes. Where I would say that most heresies in the game are actual heresies, Iconoclasm is more of a struggle within about which path the church should take. Of course if it was allowed to continue somewhere it would eventually change completely, much like Orthodoxy and Catholicism did from each other.

Let's take a different tack here. What would change in Orthodoxy if it was ruled by Iconoclasts? Well the churches would remove the images, I think I have seen pictures of churches that were never repaired from the iconoclastic rule, fairly barren and boring, but the Muslims certainly showed that they didn't have to be. That's it for looks, then there is the actual service and the Eucharist which would then not involve the procession of icons and the kissing of them. But given that the Orthodox church does not consider the icons objects of worship, and probably never did, the loss of icons would be a blow to tradition, but not the religious continuation. And the people attending service wouldn't need to be retaught much, a simple 'images are bad' would be enough. No need to go into lengthy explanations about the spiritual development or the physical aspect of this or that.

But of course people would argue passionately and everywhere, heck we do so today across many religions, but that doesn't have to mean much really. It is only when these discussions take a darker or more zealous nature, especially among the powerful that it ventures into politics. And that was what happened. Before that it was a matter of debate. But power made it politics. It was an effective way to announce your position in relation to others, and to make sure that their arguments were wiped off the table. Even if the matter of difference wasn't all that great. That's the politics of it.

Ingame it is boring yes, effectively it should act as and be Orthodoxy as to the outsider there wouldn't be a difference from before. The church would still behave in the same way to the secular world and foreigners. It would still dress the same, build the same, have the same powerstructure and still use the same words. You can't say the same for Nestorianism, Catharism, Lollardism and so on. They change fundamental principles. In the former case it changes the nature of Jesus, in the latter it changes the church to something non-churchlike thing.

 

[Accrsd]

Now i've had my fair share of things like this happening in the past. one particular playthrough it as a byz count it was the knights templar and their inexplicable conquest of jerusalem. on another i found a strange mercenary group with land in Lithuania... needless to say this one's for distance, and for glory



please note the sheer distance from Ireland as well as the fact they won it from Cumania. Who at the time is a sunni blob i believe.

 

[gornard]

Now i've had my fair share of things like this happening in the past. one particular playthrough it as a byz count it was the knights templar and their inexplicable conquest of jerusalem. on another i found a strange mercenary group with land in Lithuania... needless to say this one's for distance, and for glory

please note the sheer distance from Ireland as well as the fact they won it from Cumania. Who at the time is a sunni blob i believe.

My best was the swiss band usurping the entire kingdom of poland on their own, but thats not quite as far as yours.

 

[Calad]

Yes that would pretty much be it. Like how the Russian Orthodoxy reads the scripture as song and so on, or how the various catholic monastic orders all have their own leanings and doctrines, some of which have historically made them heretical at times.

Yes I know the importance that icons have in Orthodoxy, but remove the icons and it is pretty much still the same religion. It isn't as if the basic philosophy changes. Where I would say that most heresies in the game are actual heresies, Iconoclasm is more of a struggle within about which path the church should take. Of course if it was allowed to continue somewhere it would eventually change completely, much like Orthodoxy and Catholicism did from each other.

Let's take a different tack here. What would change in Orthodoxy if it was ruled by Iconoclasts? Well the churches would remove the images, I think I have seen pictures of churches that were never repaired from the iconoclastic rule, fairly barren and boring, but the Muslims certainly showed that they didn't have to be. That's it for looks, then there is the actual service and the Eucharist which would then not involve the procession of icons and the kissing of them. But given that the Orthodox church does not consider the icons objects of worship, and probably never did, the loss of icons would be a blow to tradition, but not the religious continuation. And the people attending service wouldn't need to be retaught much, a simple 'images are bad' would be enough. No need to go into lengthy explanations about the spiritual development or the physical aspect of this or that.

But of course people would argue passionately and everywhere, heck we do so today across many religions, but that doesn't have to mean much really. It is only when these discussions take a darker or more zealous nature, especially among the powerful that it ventures into politics. And that was what happened. Before that it was a matter of debate. But power made it politics. It was an effective way to announce your position in relation to others, and to make sure that their arguments were wiped off the table. Even if the matter of difference wasn't all that great. That's the politics of it.

Ingame it is boring yes, effectively it should act as and be Orthodoxy as to the outsider there wouldn't be a difference from before. The church would still behave in the same way to the secular world and foreigners. It would still dress the same, build the same, have the same powerstructure and still use the same words. You can't say the same for Nestorianism, Catharism, Lollardism and so on. They change fundamental principles. In the former case it changes the nature of Jesus, in the latter it changes the church to something non-churchlike thing.

Good points. But I must point out Iconoclasm was serious matter back then. Byzantine Empire was a Theocracy and even minor religion difference was matter of life and death. There was two Iconoclasm chrisis in Empire and they were serious political crisis as well. Heresis in ck2 are meant to create schism, so Iconoclasm is game technically a heresy.

 

[Kraxis]

Good points. But I must point out Iconoclasm was serious matter back then. Byzantine Empire was a Theocracy and even minor religion difference was matter of life and death. There was two Iconoclasm chrisis in Empire and they were serious political crisis as well. Heresis in ck2 are meant to create schism, so Iconoclasm is game technically a heresy.

Yes, it is a functional heresy, it works well enough. But the point I made is that the actual difference is very small. It mattered a lot to the people of course as it was one of the most visible aspects of churchlife, but then again most differences proposed to churchlife garnered a lot of... attention. But the problems it created was down to people letting it, to how people used it. The political leadership could have toned it down, but they cranked it up instead. Iconoclasm, if it took the power and held it, would still be Orthodoxy in the way that we understand it. The other heresies would not usurp 'the title' so to speak. They would create their own religions... Well I guess the Monophysites, Nestorians and Fratticelli could continue the established order in more or less the same way (if with significant theological differences), though I would argue in a much much less recognisable way than Iconoclasm in relation to Orthodoxy. I would equate Iconoclasm to the so-called Celtic Church (bad term but I use it to establish it's origin), in fact a regular Catholic would be a lot more surprised at how the Irish did things than a regular Orthodox would at an Iconoclastic service.
Anyway, I better stop this. This is a place for funny screenshots. I just wanted to say that I liked the possibility of Iconoclastic takeover of Orthodoxy.

 

[Fluffy.]

Kingdom of Andalusia in ........... Leicester?!?!

So whats happening in Iberia then??

It all makes sensee

 

[Shadowhope]

This guy is my greatest king ever.

 

[opellulo]

5 sins and lunatic... "Blessed" by who? Satan?

 

[Auvar]

So I noticed there was a new antipope.

And... that they're both in Rome...?

So, the old Pope apparently managed to get a random lowborn courtier pregnant, but died six days before the child was born. The kid immediately became antipope at birth, and for 14 years now has been hanging out at Rome, a courtier of the actual Pope. The (real) Pope, naturally, hates the kid, but hasn't done anything about him. The rest of us Catholics have just been suffering through -20% moral authority for the past 14 years; I'm not sure how much that matters, though, as heresy has hardly been spiraling out of control (and we're still holding steady at about 60%). Maybe when he turns 16, I'll invite him to my court and have a free antipope? (I imagine he'll accept; his current liege obviously won't press his claims!)

All I can think of is that this is some kind of super-rare bug involving posthumous children; the appearance of a character with a claim on the Papacy during a Pope's reign seems to have tricked the game into thinking he is an antipope. The result is a great premise for a medieval sitcom.

Also, how sweet that he took his father's Pope name :wub:

 

[firelordzuko]

Na, it appears all the time. Popes are normally old when they sire their bastards, and their successors hate them, so they don't normally get old, but all children of popes get weak claims. Only way to press them, of course, would be incapable or imprisoned popes.

 

[Shadowhope]

Well, he hears the Voice of Satan, so...

Strangely, despite his massive realm and the huge number of bad traits, there was only ever one small revolt in his reign. The first ten years involved some very, very careful moves to bribe/flatter/murder/imprison troublemakers. The next ten I spent less time worrying. By the end, I just stopped managing the realm entirely. My vassals all loved their crazy God-Emperor.