[CKII -> EUIV] Another boring day in history class?

[FacelessOne]

You sit down at your desk, wondering if this will be another boring day in history class but when your teacher walks into the class room she isn't alone this time.
She is accompanied by a man, roughly her age, in an expesive looking tieless black suit.

***

"Hello there. My name is Stéfan l'Aigle and I'am Professor of Medieval History at the Université Impériale de Jerusalem. Your teacher and I where very good friends back back when we both studied."
He glances over to her, she smiles back at him.

"As Founders Day is aproaching and because it comes up in your teaching schedule anyway, I'm here to tell you more about our great nation and our people. Well more than all the hero tales you probably already heard a thousand times over."
He sits down at the edge of the teachers desk.

"So...where do we start?"

***

Lesson #1 - What came before...
Lesson #2 - Deus Vult...?
Lesson #3 - Eternal Crusade...
Lesson #4 - The Hammer...
Lesson #5 - Harelips, Bastrads and broken things...
Lesson #6 - Little precious kindling left...

***

Spoiler

Rules:
More or less the same as in my old AAR. But this time I won't fiddle around with the AI as much as I had back then and focus more on "what a dynastie can do" as mentioned in my Blog.
For everything else:
Game was started on Patch 3.1.0
Normal difficulty
There are no mods in use
I will (and already have two times at this point) change dynasties, if it seems apropriate to me.
Additions:
Some pictures will be edited, because they look better that way
And of course I "game the game"

Also the usual disclaimer:
English isn't my native tongue.
So if you find any spelling mistakes, keep them! Or tell me, so I can correct them in due time.

​

 

[FacelessOne]

Lesson #1 - What came before...

"To get a full picture of our people, it is best to start at the beginning of it all. Or at least at the point we can proof through historical documents. In this case it would be the year 870 A.D. and this fine gentleman."
He starts up his PowerPoint presentation and the beam of the projector hits the wall above the blackboard.​

***

"This is Hæsteinn 'the Hunter'. It is said that he was born in early 835 A.D. either on Shetland, which was called back then Hjaltland, or Føroyar as the only son of King Sigurðr 'the Mead Master' of Norðreyjar, the old norse geographical term for said islands."
The Picture on the wall changes.​

***

"He also claimed descendance from a figure we only know today because of The Sagas, the holy book of what is left of the norse faith. You probably heard about him, he's quit popular in popculture these days: The evil King Hroðgar 'Ironheart'."
Yet another picture ist shown.

***

"Judging by some of your grins, you do have heard of him. Anyway, back to Hæsteinn. He was, like many of his people a known and feart raider or Viking. But instead of raiding england or the northern coasts of the european continent his targets usually were on the iberian peninsula and the wider mediterraneanian sea. Especially the riches of the muhammedan Citys of Cádiz, Tangier, Tunis and even Alexandria."
He shifts around on the desk he's sitting on.

"It was back then when he realised the thread the muhammedans were posing. As a bit of context to that period of time: Since 800 A.D. the Umayyad Caliphate controlled the whole of the iberian peninsula. In 810 A.D. the leftovers of the roman empire in the east fell to converted steppe hordes. And by 851 A.D..."
He makes airquotes:
"...the hordes of the prophet conquered Djion and Trier in the very heart of europe."

"We don't know how long it took him or what he had to promise, but he seemed to gathered each and every man in northern europe who could hold a sword and invaded the Umayyads in 866 A.D."
He shifts his seat again, sitting more straight than before.

"The accounts differ on this. The chronicles of Francia say that Quote: '35.000 norsemen riding titanic dragons over the sea.' While the texts from muhammedan sources speak of an army of 40.000 - 50.000 men."

After a short break he continues:
"While we don't know how much there actually were, we know that like a wedge, the norseman splitt the Umayyad lands open from Bordeaux to Marseille. The war only took short 3 years, in which the..."
He makes another set of airquotes:
"...unbeatable armys of the Caliphate never even had a chance of organising any kind of resistance. The classic example of conquering more than you can hold on to."
The presentation now shows a map of western europe and parts of Mauretania.

"I have to say, that this map isn't 100% though. After all, everything happened almost 1200 years ago."
He stands up, walking over to his Laptop.

***

"Hæsteinn finally died in 889 A.D. at the Age of 54 but not before having one more trick up his sleeve. You see, in the norse society of old there was a kind of club called The Wolf Warrior. A mix of a fight and a drinking club. He was part of this club and in 876 A.D. someone, probably under the influence, had the brilliant idea to wander into the, by this point only in name, Byzantine Empire and start picking fights with the people there."
He starts to laugh.
"And that's what they did, still drunk of course! And the punshline is, that they actually pulled it off!"

***

He starts to turn off the projector.
"But that's the end of it, for today at least. It was an honor to be here, you were such a lovely
audience. Untill next time."
He bows before you all.​

 

[FacelessOne]

Lesson #2 - Deus Vult...?

When you enter the class room, Professor l'Aigle is already sitting behind the teachers desk, doing snall talk with everyone who is willing to listen. After the bell rings, he stands up.
"I always imagine that there was some kind of 'Conspiracy' surrounding the 4th crusade between pope Cealestinus II, Emporer François and his younger twin Léon."
He starts the lession with rather ominous words.

***

"Let's look at the facts..."
He continues his statement.
"...in 1004 A.D. the Awgustin Caliphate of Arabia falls to internal strife. What is left of its territory is balkanised by many different Sheikhs, Emirs and even some Sultans. In 1005 A.D. the pope calls for a crusade for Jerusalem, the first offensive crusade after the first 3 were of a defensive nature and hosted in central europe, giving only a year preperation time. The crusade started on March 29th, 1006 A.D..."

"...on May 6th, 1006 A.D. a almost 29.000 strong host under the command of François and Léon lands near Jaffa and lays siege to the to the castle."

"The other lords soon followed and some minor skirmishes happened. The first real battle was fought near Jaffa, called 'The Battle of Arsuf' on December 23rd, 1006 A.D."

"It took the defending coalition yet another eight months to respond in 'some' force near Agelen on August 4th, 1007 A.D."

"On October 7th, 1007 A.D. another small army was defeted near Nablus."

"And the last big battle of the crusade, at the gates of Jerusalem itself on Novemver 7th, 1007 A.D."

***

"December 29th, 1007 A.D. officially marks the end of the crusade, or how we know it 'The first phase'."

***

"What followed, we all know: 'The first Expansion' or 'second phase' by the Kings Léon and Étienne de Toulouse from 1007-1052 A.D."
He shows a map of the middle east on the projector.

"I'm not the only one who thinks that these are a bit to many 'coincidences' or whatever you want to call it, in one place? Anyway, for as long as the archives of the Vatican are closed, we'll never know."

***

Sensing a lingering question in the room.
"Yes, the map marks the reigns of both Kings. As we all know, the 5th crusade did slow down the Expansion rather drastically. But that is s story for another lesson."

He concludes.
"This will end todays rather short lesson. As always, it was a pleasure to be your here with you."
He bows before you all.​

 

[FacelessOne]

Lesson #3 - Eternal Crusade...

"Hello class. Well, after one of the..."
Professor l'Aigle starts this lesson already with airquotes.
"...proudest moment in our history, today we'll have to talk about arguably one of the darkest."

"The Eternal Crusade."
With these words he again shows pictures via the projector.

***

"With around 3 years of prior preperation, in 1040 A.D. Pope Hadrianus II. kicked off the 5th Crusade, organised by his predecesor Innocentius III."

"After the successes of the first 4 Crusades, the christian world was full of confidence and the goal was to take back Konstantinople, which fell back in 850 A.D."

***

"For the sake of simplicity I'll just cover the anatolian campaign, as the balkan campaign is of no concern for us this time. Everything went as usual and half a year later a 26.000 men strong host marched from the lavant along the mediterranean coast toward Konstantinople."

"In the morning hours of the 19th of October 1040 A.D. near the city of Kios in the province of Nikaea it then came to the first battle."
He then shows an artists illustration of the battle.

"But from there on, as news of the true scale of the muhammedan armies reached King Étienne in his tent - yes, that was the time when leaders of a nation still personally lead their armies in the field - it was an uphill battle. You see, the muhammedans had finally learned their lesson and over the next few years this somewhat local conflict turned into something like a world war as by 1045 A.D. more of less the whole of the christian and islamic world was in one part or the other involved."

***

"What followed was a string of defeats in both theaters of the war."
He shows you more illustrations.

"January 3rd, 1041 A.D. near Dorieion."

"And on October the 1st 1041 A.D. in the Battle of Verissa."

***

"With the army mostly destroyed, Étienne returend to Jerusalem and started planing a new campaign for the following years as it took time to raise fresh levies. From 1042 A.D. to 1046 A.D. he then started a new frontline by invading the parts of the pontic steppe, the greeks had conquered years ago, but still lacked any meaningfull fortifications in the hopes of splitt the muhammedan host even further."
Jokingly he adds.
"Let's just say: It didn't worked so well, as noone gave two sh*ts about these lands. So he installed his half-brother Léon as High Chief over these lands, only for him to lose them again in 1069 A.D., and returned once more to Jerusalem."

***

"It then took more then 7 years for any Outremer to return to the Crusade. Yes, the war was still going on in the winter between the years of 1053 A.D. and 1054 A.D. With a fresh host of 24.000 men he started to pillage and plunder the border provinces between him and the greeks, taking Edessa in the process."
His voice gets a little silent now.
"Unfortunately on 31th of May 1054 A.D., in the Battle of Sruk, King Étienne took a warhammer blow to the head and died a week later at only 39 years of age."

"His death was considered a great loss, as he was one of the brightest minds of his time."

***

"At the life of his son and successor Adémar 'the Lame' we'll maybe take a look somewhere down the line but to be honest: He didn't do much as he died in 1059 A.D. in a Skirmish near Shekhan during the Hussayn war for Al-Jazira."

He chuckles.
"Okay okay, I know what you think. Yes, he took in 1056 A.D. Konstantinople and won a the Battle of Deuteron in 1057 A.D. but from a historians standpoint, he's only a footnote in the story of our nation."

***

"Don't you worry. I mean, you know what will come next: Élodie 'the Hammer'."
He observes the faces of the class for a moment.
"But that will be the story of the next lesson!"
He starts laughing.
"Untill then."​

 

[FacelessOne]

Lesson #4 - The Hammer...

"I hope you all had a nice Founders Day on May 1st. Who else did watch this years military parade?"
With this rhetorical question the Professor starts todays lesson. Many of your class mates simply answers him by using the army salute, a gesture obviously copied from the ancient roman legions.

"Where did we left of last time? Ah yes, 1059 A.D. and the death of Adémar I."

"And of corse the succession of 'the Hammer', Queen Élodie at the tender age of 3."

***

"Before we start: I won't take any sides on her matter. I just lay out the known facts about her and her life. The good and the bad. So please, no..."
He makes his airquotes.
"...current year politics. Are we clear?"

"Élodie belonged to the first generation of Outremer who we might call a proper Outremer. Not only was medieval french only her second lagnuage, first being old lavantine, a creol between old french, old italian and latin, plus small bits of arameic here and there - which would way down the line would evolve into modern day lavantine, which I use this very moment to speak to you."

"She also grew up in a way, usually more akin to boy in that time. Although she inherrited the clubfoot her father already had, at the age of 7 she had shown quite the talent for riding aswell as fighting with the lance and the spear. Hunting was her passion and by the year she got ever more headstrong and ambitious. So no wonder that the council of lords, the regency council, lost control over her when she entered her teens."

***

"Since the death of Adémar, no Outremer had set foot into Anatolia, the Eternal Crusade would at that point go on another 5 years. A token force would be send in 1073 A.D. but it is generally viewed that the Eternal Crusade was doomed from the very beginning."

"So in 1070 A.D. Élodie took the initiative and marched her troops into the remnants of the Muhallabid Sultanate, the quasi successor state to the fallen Awgustin Caliphate, but who themselfs were under constant pressure by steppe hordes and the emerging Pala Empire in India."
Jokingly he adds.
"It wasn't a war per sé, more a big free for all where smaller armies just went into the desert and stuck the Banner of Jerusalem into everything they've found. But it did set the territory, marking...time for some more airquotes...her borders untill her death in 1099 A.D."

"Only two major battles were fought, one won one lost"
He shows them to you with the usual help of his laptop.

"On October 16th, 1070 A.D..."

"...and on December 8th, 1070 A.D."

He then shows his own map of Jerusalem.

"These extra territories in Persia and on the Horn of Africa you see came with the peace deal. Something something medieval casus belli shenanigans."

***

"Most of her reign she focused on developing the corelands along the mediterranean coast, dealing with rebellions by nobles, peasents and religious leaders. Pillaging and almost irreparably destroying both the ancient Pyramids of Giza and the Desert City of Petra, to fund her many building projects."

​

"Yes, she didn't only do good deeds. In fact, one could argue that all her wrong doings might outweigh the rest. Yes, she was the first christian ruler to have contact with china, trading with them and getting filithy rich in the process but she also did, as mentioned, destroy willingly historical treasures to get even richer."

"Yes, she developed the lands, helped the common people - as long as they were christian and Outremer - but she also joined in her twentys a cult who practiced theistic satanism and was involved in unspeakable things."
His voice has a hind of sadness in it.
"She did good things, but she wasn't a good person at the end. More zealous people, in the past and present, say that everything that happened after her was atleast partial her fault, because of the things she did. Call it devine wrath, if you want to."

"Her firstborn daughter, Béatrix, died suddenly in her sleep at the age of 7. Robert, her firstborn son was assassinated after only one year of rule at the age of 13. Her third son, Jaques, died because of his weak physic at the age of 5. Leaving only two of her five children to reach adulthood. Her youngest, Éléonore, which she birthed at the age of 42. This also sealed her own fate, as her aging body couldn't bear another pregnancy. And of course her second born son ultimative successor, Richard 'the Victorious', who himself is his own sack of fleas."

***

"Yes, that Richard."
He grins.
"But as usual, this is a story for another time."​

 

[FacelessOne]

Lesson #5 - Harelips, Bastrads and broken things...​

"Hey class. I hope you're not angry with me, skipping last week?"
Although it at first sound like an apologie, it ain't,
"I could tell you now that I was sick or prepared something special but as you know: We do not lie. - I had extended my vacation in France to visit some of the Saints burial sites."

***

He starts fiddling around with his trusty laptop.
"We ended last lesson with the death of Élodie, right? So...give me a moment..."
He fiddles a little more then a picture is projected to the wall above the chalkboard.

"...after her, her eldest son Robert succeded her but as it sometimes happens, one morning he woke up just to find that he was assassinated during the night after only 11 month on the throne. So...Next King please."
His smug grin speaks volums.
"Yes, I know: Not funny! But as I told you last time, many people to this day think that what happened was devine wrath."

***

"So then it was Richards turn. A little boy at the age of 5, he not only witnessed the death of his mother but also outlived his older brother. Add low selfesteam because of a physical deformity and you get one f*cked up child with deep scars on his soul. And to make matters even worse, 2 years later at the age of 7 someone was out for his life too. That's why he's missing his right eye."

​

***

He crosses his arms, imitating an angry child.
"And then, 4 years later some dude half a world away has the audacity to declare a holy war against you. No wonder, Richard lived most of his life as a recluse in his gardens near the castle of Acre."

"As this is the only war, defensive and offensive, during his reign, so I'll make it short and painless"

***

"04.07.1106 A.D."​

"30.07.1106 A.D."​

"18.11.1107 A.D."​

"12.12.1107 A.D."​

"09.04.1108 A.D."​

"Everything was over by mid 1108 A.D."

"It is common knowledge, but for the sake of completion: In 1109 A.D. Rome replied in kind..."

"...with predictable outcome. But besides...moral support, not much came from Richard. Well, nobody hepled him the years before either."

***

"Most of his life, the realm was under the rule of hte Council of Lords. After all he went through, he had zero interest in ruling. Things changed when he met and fell in love with a beautiful darkskinned woman from..."
Airquotes.
"...the south. A commoner, but at least they had now their King back, for a time..."

"...as she died of Great Pox in 1113 A.D., a year after the birth of their daughter Antoinette."

***

"In 1114 A.D. his younger sister and at this point only still living close kin, Éleonore came of age and was persuaded by the Council of Lords to be the mediator between them in Jerusalem and the King residing in Acre."

"This worked surprisingly good and you only can admire the restraint on side of the council to not depose of their AWOL King."
He takes a sip of his mug, before continuing. Smells like tea.
"By 1116 A.D. Éleonore was more or less the defacto queen, as she managed to charm most of the then exclusivly male Council."

***

"Can someone guess, what comes next?"
He looks around but everyone just shakes his or her head.
"Figured as much, seeing as this news is relative new. In 1117 A.D., to be exact in February and at the end of December, two children suddenly..."
Another round of airquotes.
"...appeared: Adémar and Élodie. In 1122 A.D. another, Pierre. And in 1126 yet another Éleonore. It is known that Richard had an affair with a confidant of his sister, which resulted in 1123 A.D. in a son..."

"...but the other 4 where different. Back then, if anyone knew of it in detail, probably the best keept secret ever as even I never read anything about this expect the rumors - and I've read everything! But recent genetic analysis showd that the rumors were true after all. Adémar, Élodie, Pierre and Éleonore were a product of incest between Richard and his sister Éleonore."

"Which is mostlikly the reason why the Council of Lords gave the crown to Antoinette after the death of Richard in 1128 A.D."

***

"All territorial gain during Richards reign was either due to vassales expanding on their own accord or them inherriting stuff, that inculdes the conquest of Basra in 1115 A.D. and Alexandria in 1118 A.D."

"You might guess what comes next but I won't tell, for now. Till the next Lesson."
He bows.​

 

[FacelessOne]

OOC: How "this" came to be:

Spoiler

You might have already seen on older screenshots that part of House de Toulouse held titles in a merchant republic. As the blood ran thin in the era of Richard, when Richard died (legitimized) Adémar was the heir to said title while Pierre was already dead of illness. Just to clarify that the following wasn't my intention or plan.

Lesson #6 - Little precious kindling left...

"After the death of King Richard on March 7th, 1128 A.D. the council of lords, lead by Aymar d'Arsuf, had the task to select his successor."
Professor l'Aigle starts todays lesson as soon as he walks into the classroom and continues while setting up his trusty laptop.

"After many debates the following days, it was decided to skip the, at that point, 9 year old son of Richard in favor of his already of age daughter Antoinette. The rumors surrounding Adèmar surely played their part. Unfortunately, not a year later the council had to meet yet again as Antoinette died a mere month after she gave birth to her legitimite daughter Amelie, which will become important later."

***

"This time the pope himself, Leo III., was present. Later records show that that a deal was struck, to the benefit of both the church and the Kingdom of Jerusalem. You see, the fires of the crusades started to die aswell as the blood which ignited them in the first place."
He shows you a magnificent painting of Emporer Frédéric of Francia.

"In 1113 A.D. Emporer Frédéric died at the age of 77, outliving both of his legitim heirs, Savary and Louis, who died childless themselfs. While in 1128 A.D. his daughter Stéphanie was Empress for yet another 2 years and after her, her sister Douce till 1159 A.D., it was foreseeable for Leo III. that without the firm hand of such a prestigious dynastie, the realm of Frncia would start to wither and the church would lose its strongest allie against the heathens. It was decided that Adèmar would be fully legitimized and get the crown, becoming Adèmar II. of Jerusalem. In exchange for that he had to renounce his and all of his successors bloodties to Saint Charls 'the Myrrh-Streaming', his great grand-grand-grand-grand-grandfather aswell as vowing to defeat the mohammedan heathen in his lifetime once and for all."

***

"This vow first was tested when in April of 1132 A.D. when the Shia Caliph declared a Jihad against Jerusalem."

"Based in sourthern Iberia, it took the mohammedans till the summer of the following year to show up in force at the borders and the generals of Adèmar were prepared. The invaders took the land route, so every man willing to fight was gathered in 2 great armies inbetween the Sinai and Palestine, where on October 25th, 1133 A.D. the first major battle happened."

"After this first clash, the shiites splitted their armys into smaller raiding partys. Probably in the hope to slip them through the gaps. The next noteworthy battle was on February 14th,1134 A.D."

"In the 2nd Battle of Manusura on April 3rd, 1134 A.D. Adèmar personally attacked one of the rallypoints of the invaders with is personal army while the other hunted down every last one that slipped through the cracks."

"And in the 3rd Battle of Manusura from April 27th to 28th, 1134 A.D. he battled their reinforcements."

"These battles were what broke the back of this holy war and all other engagements were only smaller scirmishes, the last one a year later on April 29th, 1135 A.D. Internal revolts forced the Caliph in June of the same year to sue for peace."

***

"And from that day on Adémar II. King of Jerusalem was known as 'the Holy'."

***

"Next time we'll continue the long story of Adèmar. Untill then."​