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Prologue & Chapter Index

Pied-Noir

Unthinking Reactionary
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Sep 6, 2011
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"Hugues Do You Think You Are?"

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King Raoul of West Francia, our dear departed royal brother

Prologue & Introduction

I don't think I've ever done one of these before so please bear with me. :)

I had originally fancied trying my hand at a Strathclyde AAR but then stumbled across @Wysemage's fantastic The Last Kingdom of Hen Ogledd (go read it, it's great!) so ruled that out as I didn't want any overlap with existing active AARs.

For this one I'll be playing as an interesting if overlooked historical character, and one of my go-to playthroughs in the awesome 936 scenario: Hugh the Black, duke of Burgundy.

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Why Hugh, I hear you ask? Hugh is fun because he's something of a blank canvas - historically he never married or fathered any known children, and his duchy ended up being divided between the Robertians and the Carolingians. He was the younger brother of the Bosonid king Raoul (Rodolphe) and attempted to press his inherited claim several times, but events always seemed to conspire against him. In game he's a mid-ranking middle-aged duke with an unimpressive set of traits and no direct male heirs of his dynasty. To me he's a fun and interesting character to play without either being overpowered as many dukes can often be, or too difficult and weak a start so as to be unable to make an impact. He begins with a strong claim on West Francia but is in no position to enforce it in 936.

Setup

- duke of Burgundy, 936 bookmark
- custom ruleset (generally more historically minded; matrilineal marriages off)
- TIP mod [private]
- Stellaris Colors Interface mod
- Century Gothic Interface mod
- Bigger Interface mod (makes UI windows and the family tree larger)

Goals

- become king of West Francia
- retain close ties with the Bosonid dynasty and ally with them where possible
- kick the Muslims out of Iberia
- place dynastic relations on other European thrones
- reform the empire of Francia

I'm going to be trying this one chapter at a time, writing one up as I finish a particular session, so this isn't a game I've already finished and had mapped out from the start. So in that sense it's a gamble - it could be fun and go on for a while, or I could die during my chapter two session and have to load a save. I don't really want to have to do that, and I'm definitely not one for loading up older saves simply because I encounter setbacks, but in the extreme case of me dying without dynastic heirs I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

Although I've played CK II on and off for years I'm new to the AAR format, so please feel free to ask questions or provide feedback on the format or my narrative style.

I'll update this post as I add subsequent chapters - next up will be the first gameplay chapter!
 
Off to a promising start - including an industrial-strength Dad-grade pun in the title! :D Consider me tuned in - good luck!
 
Grabbing a seat now. With wroth and cruel this should prove a fun rule to see, especially with that age.
 
Welcome to AAR writing. :)
 
I'm a simple man: I see a semi-bad pun used as the title, I have to give it a shot.
 
Chapter I: Beginnings (& Ends) [936 - 946]
"Hugues Do You Think You Are?"

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King Louis d'Outremer of West Francia, our liege lord

Chapter I: Beginnings (& Ends) [936 - 946]

Below is a conversation between Duke Hugues and his trusty lowborn servant, Raoul. It is an extract taken from the late medieval pamphlet 'The Life & Times of Richard the Justiciar' as subsequently translated by Dr. Eugene Fraxby.

"Good morning, my lord!" said a hearty Raoul as he briskly opened the bedroom curtains.

"Is it?" sighed the duke as he rubbed his eyes and sat up in bed.

"Are you well, sire?"

"As well as I'll ever be, I suppose. As well as a man cheated of his birthright can be. As well as a man with no sons and--"

"Oh, here we go..." muttered the lowly stool under his breath.

"Excuse me? What did you just say!?"

"I said 'how's your big toe?' my liege. Has the gout cleared up at last?"

"Ahem, yes... yes it has, thank you. Is Cerberus gelded yet? I may try riding again later, if the foot's up to it."

"Try a woman this time..."

"Insolent dog! And don't even try to deny it this time Raoul, I heard that one loud and clear!"

"You have me there my lord, a thousand pardons. It's just... well, does my lord not feel that marriage is perhaps a good idea? After all, my lord isn't getting any younger, and what will become of our noble duchy if the worst came to pass?"

"Hmm... for a knave you do speak occasional truth, Raoul. My sister is a good woman but she should not be allowed to rule my father's hard-gotten gains. I suppose I should seek out a bride and start a family of my own. Nil desperandum!"

"That's the spirit, sire! Doubtless there are many royal brides who would jump at the chance to marry such an eligible groom - why, a Bosonid prince no less!"

"Oh, about that - I already have someone in mind, and where is my hairbrush?"

"It's literally right next to you sire, on top of the other pillow, alongside your family tree scroll and the small telescope you received from that Numidian king with an ivory eye and a leg made of glass."

"Where would I be without you, Raoul? Wait, hang on, you mean a glass e--- look, nevermind, the telescope doesn't work anyway, and I've decided to marry the Queen Dowager."

"Haha! What? Queen Eadgifu? But my lord, she's in sanctuary at Troyes, and besides, she'd never acquiesce to such a union - she knows you covet her son's throne."

"No Raoul, she's en route to Dijon. My spies sent me a report two days ago - I had her abducted from Troyes by men loyal to Count Herbert, who has made common cause with us. Though he dare not risk openly declaring allegiance to us now, he has promised to do so when expediency allows for such a bold gambit."

"Good God, have you lost your mind, Hugues? You've kidnapped the King's mother and dare to conspire against his crown in secret? You cannot possibly keep such treason from vengeful ears - someone will find out! Who do you think you are!?"

"They won't, Raoul - and please, call me sire."

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Cast

Those involved or mentioned in the conversation:
  • Hugues le Noir, duke of Burgundy
  • Louis d'Outremer, king of West Francia
  • Herbert, count of Vermandois
  • Ermengarde, sister of Hugues and his heir by primogeniture
  • Eadgifu of Wessex, dowager queen of West Francia and future duchess of Burgundy
Playthrough

So what did we actually do?

Well, murdered an innocent nobody (Raoul) - obviously. :D

In addition, Hugues married King Louis' widowed mother, became Marshal of West Francia, attended his step-son's coronation (must have been awkward), appointed his council, managed to get Title Revocation Law enacted in Burgundy, upgraded the fortifications in his holdings, tutored one of his nephews (and married him to an Italian princess), and...

...decided that the duke of Anjou would be a better pick for the kingship than our arrogant and overmighty rival, Hugues le Grand, duke of Francia, and...

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...attempted - and failed - to become just, like our illustrious father Richard the Justiciar, but...

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...managed to level up our fighting skills and become both brave and proud thanks to our battles against the Moors [gained as Marshal for King Louis], and...

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...had a son and heir, as well as a daughter and spare!

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At half a century, Hugues le Noir and his wife Queen Eadgifu both enjoy rude health and a pair of fine, strapping young children. They are at the height of their diplomatic powers and have good relations with the Queen's eldest son, King Louis, for whom Hugues is Marshal, stepfather and chief counsel.

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Hugues le Noir at fifty - now a grey-haired, brave and proud father of two

...but then!

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...and then!

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...and then!

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On the 28th day of March in the Year of our Lord 946, Hugues le Noir breathed his last

Requiescat in pace

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The funeral of Hugues le Noir, who - by order of his beloved (if disinherited) sister Ermengarde - was exsanguinated, disemboweled, wrapped in white linen and thrown into the Saône river. He was later given Last Rites by a local priest and pronounced dead in absentia.

RICHARD BIVINID WILL RETURN...
 
Well Hughes le Noir did pretty well in the end.
 
Off to a promising start - including an industrial-strength Dad-grade pun in the title! :D Consider me tuned in - good luck!
Yes, got to get the ball rolling somehow, right? :D

Grabbing a seat now. With wroth and cruel this should prove a fun rule to see, especially with that age.
Yes, he has some fun traits for sure - I'm less inclined towards characters who are naturally overpowered.

Wow, he and his brother are pretty cool looking fellas. ;) Following!
Yes, I did the DNA strings for those two myself, so I'm glad you like them. :D

Welcome to AAR writing. :)
Thank you!

I'm a simple man: I see a semi-bad pun used as the title, I have to give it a shot.
Excellent! I'm glad dad-grade puns are appreciated by at least a few of us. :p
 
subbed
 
Raoul - paid the price for too much honesty and too little prudence. Hugues clearly wanted a toady. Who did he think he was? Well, the Duke. Not the fall guy for a sardonic manservant, Blackadder style. Nice use of the event :D

Enjoyed the fresh and amusing summary of his career. The regency may be a bit of a pain, but misadventure notwithstanding, you should get a nice long reign out of Richard. And maybe the famous Foulques d’Anjou as king?
 
So erm. Will this story continue or is it unfortunately dead due to irl things? I hope I’m not being rude about this oof
 
- TIP mod [private]
- Stellaris Colors Interface mod
- Century Gothic Interface mod
- Bigger Interface mod (makes UI windows and the family tree larger)
I don't recognize the Bivinid coat of arms. Or the Herbertiner, Robertiner & Ingelger. Are they custom made for your TIP-mod or am I missing a Shield DLC?
I assume the renamed dynasties and duchy of Valois (which I believe used to be part of vanilla, but no longer?) are also part of your mod?
Would you mind telling a bit about it?
 
I don't recognize the Bivinid coat of arms. Or the Herbertiner, Robertiner & Ingelger. Are they custom made for your TIP-mod or am I missing a Shield DLC?
I assume the renamed dynasties and duchy of Valois (which I believe used to be part of vanilla, but no longer?) are also part of your mod?
Would you mind telling a bit about it?
I have sent you a PM. They're all from the TIP mod.