Seems kinda ridiculous I have to choose between murdering my wife because she had a miscarriage year ago or eat a ton of stress. Character is zealous, paranoid, and vengeful on top of having irritable, so maybe that affects it.
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Yes. CK3 only considers if a memory is good or bad. It noticed you have a bad memory of a miscarriage and gave you an event to get revenge on someone involved in your bad memory.