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Official EBU Representative
Oct 17, 2003
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January 3rd 1936, Kaunas
Office of Antanas Smetona

Antanas Smetona: Stassy!

Stasys Lozoraitis: I have told you not to call me Stassy, sir. What do you ask me for?

Antanas Smetona: Yes, of course Stassy. Would you please bring me the head of state Tubelis, the chief of army Raštikis and the chief of air Gustaitis?

Stasys Lozoraitis: Yes, sir.

Stassy walks out of the room and in to a new one next to the office. He then returns with Tubelis and Raštikis. The three men walks to the room next to Tubelis and then comes out from Tubelis door with Gustaitis. The crowd walks in to Smetonas office and watches at him quietly.

Antanas Smetona: (looks up from a PC monitor) Yes? Oh, thanks Stassy. Well.. I have just finished my latest Europa Universalis game. To bad Lithuania did not exist under the 18th century. But I don’t want to play EU anymore, it’s getting repetive. So therfore I have called on you masterminds of Stratedgy for advice. So, what is your advices?

Stasys Lozoraitis: You called on us only to ask us about a game? How ridiculous.

Antanas Smetona: Do you want to be replaced, Stassy?

Stasys Lozoraitis: There are no replacements for me. Actually not for anyone of us.

General Raštikis: Quite odd. If you don’t like me, you’re stuck with me for the rest of the game. But i don’t think you are going to fire me, more likley one of those unknown fellas.

Antanas Smetona: Whatever…

Juozas Tubelis: We are getting of topic. The objective was to provide Smetona with a new strategy game.

Antanas Smetona: My puppet has spoken. Now, what are your suggestions?

Stasys Lozoraitis: Settlers?

Antanas Smetona: Never really liked to trade. I wanna war!!

General Raštikis: Bondespelet?

Antanas Smetona: Never.

Lt. General Gustaitis: Axis & Allies?

Antanas Smetona: That one’s good.

Stasys Lozoraitis: Hey, there is a game like that on PC… You can choose from any country that existed under WW2. It’s called… Um… Hearts of…

Antanas Smetona: Flesh?
Stasys Lozoraitis: No… Iron! Hearts of Iron it is!

Antanas Smetona: Very good, Stassy! Where can I order it?

Stasys Lozoraitis: Um… Try torget.se

Smetona clicks up the games menu, selects Hearts of Iron and watches the info.

Antanas Smetona: What’s the price?

Stasys Lozoraitis: 499 kronor.

Antanas Smetona: Ok. Then I put it in the cart and pay for it. There! Now I want to buy the new Radeon graphic card.

Stasys Lozoraitis: You can’t.

Antanas Smetona: Why? I am a Paternal Autocrat! A kind of dictator!

Stasys Lozoraitis: A buyer is on route. You will have to wait one week (January 10th 1936) until you can send a new one.

Antanas Smetona: Oh.
 
I think it's about 55 euro. Nice start, klas_knas!
 
April 9th 1936. Office of Antanas Smetona.
Smetona: Look at this, Stassy. Im kinda concerned.

Stasys Lozoraits: What is on your mind, dear master?

Smetona: On two days, two major things have happend. Just that's odd. Untill now, everybody has just sitten there and influenced each other. Hell, why can't we influence someone?

Stasys Lozoraits: : Probably because we don't got enough Diplomatic influence?

Smetona: Word. But the two things that has happend really worries me. First, yesterday, Nationalist China allied with these communists at the other side of Wilno, also known as Soviet Union. The other thing happend a few hours ago, when Italy annexed Ethiopia. This means they got a foothold in Africa and got more provinces.

Stasys Lozoraits: I see, sir. Do you think war is comming to Europe again?

Smetona: Well, lets find out, Stassy. Make my plane ready. We will be in Rome before next day.

Stasys Lozoraits: Yes sir!


Same day. The airfield outside Kaunas.

Stasys Lozoraits: What do you mean, 'out of maximum range'?

Pilot: Just what it says. I can't go more than 200 kilometers before I need to refuel this out-dated heap of junk.

Stasys Lozoraits: Aw, man.

Pilot: Don't blame me, I'm not in charge of research. Blame him.

Stasys Lozoraits: Yeah. Any other suggestions on how to get to Rome?

Pilot: By car...



A few days later. Rome, Italy.
The little Trabant turns in to the big parking lot in front of the building were they were to meet Mussolini. Stasys crawled out of the Trabant.

Stasys Lozoraits: Aoow, my back! These Trabants are so f*ing small!

Smetona: Stop complaining, Stassy. Enjoy the sun! Feel Italy!

Stasys Lozoraits: How can I? It will only get worse! After Rome, Berlin, then London and last Moscow. Why did we not stop in Berlin when we passed it?

Smetona: Berlin? Italy started this thing. Plus, now i can drive on Autobhan twice!

Stasys Lozoraits: Whats the point of speed only reaches 30 mph?

Smetona: Shut up. Italy, the land of Ferrari, Porche and Pasta... Lets go find Mussolini now.


Smetona and Stasys enters Mussolinis office. Mussolini greats them, allthough he doensn't seems to recognize the Lithuanian leader.

Mussolini: I am very greatful to be visited by the leaders of Latvia. Please sit down.

Smetona: Lithuania. We have watched your movements for the last days since you annexed Ethiopia, but one question remains. Will you hold the peace in Europe and stop a second world war from ever happening to us?

Mussolini: Um.. No.

Smetona: Oh... Are we included in your evil plans?

Mussolini: Hell no, only Albania.

Smetona: Albania?

Mussolini: Yeah, that little country west of Yugoslavia.

Stasys Lozoraits: Ok. That makes no difference to us. Thank you and goodbye. Germany next!

Mussolini: Already? I would have hoped you would stay a little longer... Tke a beer, enjoy the sun...

Smetona: Sure, why not? I am an expert on beers. Hand me a Buddweise, please.
 
I love these minor aar but Lithuania whatever side you pick its a 50/50 chance of sucess axis might win or soviet wins oh well guess I got to wait
:)

Sorry for OT but Alexandru how do you get your sig black?
 
Small uptade.


Somewhat later. Berlin, Germany. Adolf Hitler and Goering walks out to welcome the Lithuanian visitors.

Goering: Heil Hitler! Welcome to the mighty Germany, who will conquer the world.

Hitler: Word.

Smetona: (Whispers to Stays) Doesn't look to mighty for me. Remind me that Germany shall be ouers before end of the game in 1948.

Hitler: What?

Smetona: Oh, nothing.

Hitler: So, wha brings you to Germany, mr. Smetona?

Smetona: I am traveling around the globe to see i the world is going to war. I am feeling a bit unsecure..

Hitler: um... I'm planning to Take Austria, the Checz, Poland, Yugoslavia and something more... Do you remember the last one, Goering?

Goering: The soviets.

Hitler: Oh, that it was. Well, I have a request on yor territory. Give me Memel.

Smetona: Wtf^

Stasys Lozoraits: And what if we refuses?

Hitler: Then be crussed under the mighty toe of Germany.

Smetona: You mean foot, don't you?

Hitler: A toe is all that's needed for your little country.

Smetona: Allright, we'll think about it.

Hitler: Sure. Where are you going now?

Smetona: London. Bye!

Hitler: Well, see you later in Memel.
 
update tomorrow with screenshot <--- :)
Conquering Sweden taking loger than thouht...
 
Fun.
 
No time for update, no time for the new screen. Be happy with this old one.

ScreenSave8.JPG
 
WTF?

How did you get Wilno? And Leningrad???