Phillippes dream: A tale from BurgundiAA(R)

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1430-40
To war again!

August 4th
The lowlands is almost united!
The last ruler of Brabant has died, and his possessions are now belongings of the good duke, Phillippe of Burgundy.
Now, only a western and a northern part lingers from Phillippe.

September 6th
Royal Court, Dijon, duchy of Burgundy
Phillippe:

- So, then the parrot said...

Depeche:

- My lord!

- What? You better have a good excuse for this!

- My lord, we now control most of the lowlands.

- Oh, I didn't know that.

- Please, sir, let me finish. We are witnessing the rise of a united country under the dauphiné, and they will be dangerous, not to mention the english. So please, let us move our royal court to Bruxelles instead.

- You have guts, telling me what to do. Normally, I'd kill you for it, but this wine sure has made me happy. Okey, let us move! Bruxelles, here we come!

- And the english?

- Screw them, let them have their scones and bacon, I want wine, beer and whatever the rabble in the lowlands produce.

January 26th, 1431

Note to Phillippe: The duke of Lorraine, Charles, has died. The duchy of Lorraine subjucate themselves to our will.

November 5th, Bruxelles, duchy of Burgundy
Jean de Pressy:

- My lord, the day we have waited for has arrived.

Phillippe:

- Uh?

- Well, sir, Luxembourgh! They have agreed to join our glorious duchy!

- Wonderful! Why did they accept that?

- Well, most german states objected of course, but the judge did say that we have the biggest right to Luxembourgh.

- Even though we're not german at all?

- Well, let's just say that the judge will be living the good life from now on.

- What?

- Sorry, sire, can't tell you anything.

 

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September 7th, 1436, Bruxelles, duchy of Burgundy
The peasants are on rise!
Apperently, they disapprove to Phillippes rule.

Jean de Pressy:

- My lord duke, the peasants in Bruges are revolting against our rule.

Phillippe:

- Then kill them!

- Why not give them what they want? More autonomy?

- You really want to lose your head that badly?

- Um...killing peasants sir! Soldiers, on the double, to Bruges!

December 4th, Bruxelles, duchy of Burgundy
Phillippes speech, church in Bruxelles:
The brilliant general, Jean de Pressy is dead. He was a great man, a man I saw up to. The things we will remember him for is mostly his conquest of the Elsass province, but also his sucessfull campaign against the dauphiné, even though we gained no provinces from it. He never stopped being a proud and strong defender of our duchy, and the people in this duchy will never forget him. Nor will I. Farewell, my friend, may the glory of God shine your way to salvation.

December 19th, 1439
A declaration of war was sent to the dauphiné, but due to bad luck, the messenger was caught by the english and they thought the declaration of war was against them.

That's it for now. Next chapter, cleverly named 1440-50, will most likely arrive Sunday (if my hangover isn't to severe:rofl. Oh, and you might have noted that there was no war in this chapter Sorry, bad planning.

 

[Enewald]

Dauphin is still a dauphin?
Lols, how old is his daddy?
You shall become Dutch?
Noes, then conquer the Dutchmen faster!

 

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Don't worry, it's just a smoke screen As I said the war against dauphiné "accidently" became a war against England...which you will read about in the next update

EDIT: Oh by the way, I love how the game uses propaganda , when an country accepts an annexation, they "accepted our irresistible offer".
It's the same with rebels, "the freedomloving rebels of [insert name] har left the yokes of slavery and joined our glorious realm" or something like that...

 

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1440-50
Meeting the damn english!

On January 1st, the english received the declaration of war (originally planned to go to the dauphiné).

Phillippe:

- It seems the english wants a fight with us. They will have it! They control the province of Picardie, which rightfully should belong to us.

Little over a month later, 21st of February, Nivernais, Picardie and the former french capital, Paris, was under siege by overwhelming burgundian forces.

On the 26th of April, 1440, Paris fell to the burgundians.
And roughly one month later, the 30th of May, Picardie fell.
The forces that took Paris is now rushing towards Calais.

November 14th, 1440
Paris, english kingdom

English diplomat:

- Sires, it is a pleasure to meet you, even though I wish it had been under a better situation.

Phillippe:

- Skip the chit-chat, what do you offer us?

- Hmmph...we are willing to give you Paris, Nevers and Amiens.

- Just like that? Geeh, you english aren't as bad as I thought. Uh, I hope this incident won't damage future relations between us.

- For the right price, I can en-..

- Off with his head!

January 11th, 1441
Bruxelles, duchy of Burgundy
The duke, Phillippe III is sitting in his throne room, thinking about all that was and all that can become.
Suddenly, a man rushes into his room and salutes.

Phillippe:

- What is it?

Man:

- My lord duke, we have the chance to sign the treaty of Copenhagen now.

- The what now?

- The treaty of Copenhagen. It is a treaty that *mumbles*

- Ah I see, well give it here and I'll sign it.

 

[Enewald]

Burgundy loves England!
Just knock the door, and they know exactly what you want.

 

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- Waaaaar!!!

The town crier in Bruxelles shouted out this word, over and over again.
Phillippe was woken by it, and immediatly called for the town crier and his advisors.

Phillippe:

- What are you babbling about crier?

Town Crier:

- Waaar!!!! The!!!! Rotten!!!! Swines!!!! In!!! BOHEMIA!!!!!-

- Geeh, stop SHOUTING!!

- Sorry duke...as I said, the rotten swines in Bohemia has declared war upon us.

- But...why?

- I guess the don't like us. But I don't understand, they can't reach us here.

- Well, why didn't you cry that instead of just war?! Now I'm up already thanks to you. And the people in our city! Have you lost every ounch of sense in you boy? Off with his head!

- B-b-but...*chop*

On 16th November, 1443, peace was officially declared in the city of Prague, where the leader of Bohemias alliance, Stettin had to pay up 100 for the looting of the Zeeland cities.

18th February, 1446
Note to Phillippe: For 3 days ago, Lorraine wanted to become a part of our growing country, and today, it is formal and official. Lorraine belongs to the duchy of Burgundy.

July, 1447, Bruxelles, duchy of Burgundy

Messenger:

- Sir, we have received an answer from Emperor Frederick III regarding your request of the Lothringian crown.

Phillippe:

- Ah, what did he say?

- He said no, sir.

- What?! How dare! I will show him!

December, 1449, Bruxelles, duchy of Burgundy
Phillippe sits all alone one night in his chamber, thinking about what he has accomplished. It these short years, he has managed to take Burgundy from a small and difficult spot squeezed in between France and the german states, and thanks to his diplomatic skills, management skills and military skills he has managed to put Burgundy on the map, for burgundians and others. The proof of that was the "war" against Bohemia. In time, more countries will feel threatened by this growing duchy, and who knows what will happen?
Phillippe smiles, and takes out the latest map of Europe.

He takes one final look, and then, still smiling, he closes his eyes and fall asleep.

That's it for now. Next update will come Friday (probably Saturday if you know me).

 

[Enewald]

You're still a duke?
Wow.
You better crown yourself soon Rex Regnum Lothar.

 

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I'd like to, but since Austria denied me that chance...I'll just keep on being a plain, old duke Dauphinés ruler is still Charles by the way

 

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July, 1447, Bruxelles, duchy of Burgundy

Messenger:

- Sir, we have received an answer from Emperor Frederick III regarding your request of the Lothringian crown.

Phillippe:

- Ah, what did he say?

- He said no, sir.

- What?! How dare! I will show him!

I blame that last sentence on Phillippe and the huge amount of wine he drank that night.
And why is there only one person commenting this? xD I feel lonely.

 

[unmerged(126013)]

Sure there are many more people reading this And the fact they dont comment might mean that your writting is so good that it doesnt need comments

 

[unmerged(129533)]

Sure there are many more people reading this And the fact they dont comment might mean that your writting is so good that it doesnt need comments

Hahaha! Stop it, my ego doesn't need more feeding

 

[Brian Roastbeef]

Aww, see I was just about to comment, but now its just going to be perceived that I don't believe the writing is good enough.

Anyway, good so far for Philippe. There are a lot of good provinces now under Burgundian control.

 

[unmerged(129533)]

Aww, see I was just about to comment, but now its just going to be perceived that I don't believe the writing is good enough.

Anyway, good so far for Philippe. There are a lot of good provinces now under Burgundian control.

Thanks Rostbiff And just wait, Burgundy will probably get a few more good provinces in the future Call it a gut-feeling if you will.

 

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1450-60
Death, decay and conquest

August 30th, 1450, note to Phillippe:
My lord duke. The hanseatic city-states of Mecklenburg and Bremen has agreed to let us join their alliance along with Schleswig-Holstein. They are not happy with our take-over of Luxembourgh, but at this time they are afraid of us.

Duting 1451 unrest came to be in Ghent in the lowlands. Seems like these peasants never give up, right?

Phillippe:

- I want those peasants dead.

Mercenary leader:

- Certainly. They will die.

August 27th, 1457, Bruxelles, duchy of Burgundy

Phillippe:

- The time has come attack the dauphiné! Their precious monarch Charles has died, and now some Louis is controlling their territory. He is weak, much weaker than us. Let us liberate our french brethren.

Advisor:

- My lord, I must advice against that. I doubt the english would like it if we chop up the dauphiné for ourselves.

- I'll chop you good!

Five minutes later
New advisor:

- My lord, I suggest we attack the dauphiné now!

Phillippe:

- Excellent. Make it happen.

In October that year burgundian troops invaded Orléans and Lyon. The dauphiné retreated into their country when the overwhelming armies of the duchy came. Will they fight back?

The dauphiné never stood a chance. They only battles occuring were The Battle of Lyon and the Slaughter at Tours, in both battles the dauphiné were brutally defeated, and they had already lost Lyon and Orléans, and Tours, Montpellier and Le Mans were in danger. Louis had no chance but to surrender to the duke.

At the end of the year 1459, Phillippe was extremely happy. He had taken the two strategic important cities of Orléans and Lyon, and his duchy now spanned from the south of the french lands up through the lowlands. But he was not yet satisfied. He looked at a map of Europe, and made up plans with his military advisor on how to proceed next.

And since noone objected against this, Phillippe called it the nigth and went to bed.

Next update...Wednesday!

 

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Sweet, no objections hehe, are you to scared to say against a crazy swede?

 

[Enewald]

I'd say expand to the Mediterranean, where the old burgundy lies...

 

[Brian Roastbeef]

Philippe's plans are worrying most of Europe. I hope he seeks vassalization and not annexation of all of those minors at once, or else there are going to be crazy BB issues. Are those minors all part of one alliance?

 

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Philippe's plans are worrying most of Europe. I hope he seeks vassalization and not annexation of all of those minors at once, or else there are going to be crazy BB issues. Are those minors all part of one alliance?

I hope not We'll see. And I love BB-wars xD When I've annexed/vassalized those minors (at least 2-3 chapters ahead), I will (as been stated before), head south to reclaim old burgundian lands.

And I do wonder what happened to France Poor France.

 

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1460-70
The death of a dreamer

Phillippe rose up, gently, wondering what little city-state he would harass today.
He had completey forgotten about the war between his duchy and Provence. Or war and war, no victims had been claimed during that war, and after 36 months, they called a cease-fire, and Phillippe was really surpised to learn that. Oh well, another day, another lesson.

In October 22 1462, a stupid noble is arrested in Paris, where he is gathering support for his claim as the true king of France. Naturally, death is the only solution.

September 8th, 1463
Bruxelles, duchy of Burgundy
Town Crier:

- Today we got the word that our glorious leader Phillippe III le Bon is retiring from military service. He has assured us that this does not have anything to do with the fact that he is 67 years old, he says he has many years left to go. Let us hope so. Let us pray to the All-mighty God.

On August 15th, 1464, the Pope Pius II called for a new Crusade.
Phillippe received the note and rushed to his advisors.

Phillippe:

- What is this crap?! I can't go to the Mediterrean and kill turks! I have enough on my mind already.

Advisor #1:

- But, my lord, these infidels should be wiped out from the face of the Earth, or are you to afraid to go?

*you know what happened to him*

Advisor #2:

- Even though I do not think this Crusade is a waste of time, I say let the Hungarians, Austrians and Turks wear each other out.

Phillippe:

- Well answered, advisor. This Crusade is hopeless!

The duchy is grieving! Their glorious, magnificent leader Phillippe III le Bon died on June 15th, 1467. His offspring Charles took the throne under the name Charles le Téméraire, or Charles Ier.

Charles first action was to rewrite his fathers plans. An invasion of northeast Germany was not wanted. Instead, focus was laid on reconquering lands once belonging to the duchy, more specifically the duchy of Savoy.

In the end of the 1460's, the ruler Sigismund of Tyrol was in financial trouble after a war against swiss raiders. Since he had no control of the Elsass-province, he tried to sell it to Charles, even though Burgundy already owned it. However, Sigismund also promised that he and all his successors would denounce claims to that province. The good-hearted Charles accepted.
However, as a gift to Charles, Sigismund also gave upp claim and possession of the Baden-province. Charles was extremely happy with this.

On December 21st, the duchy of Burgundy started a war against the duchy of Savoy.

How will it end?

Hopefully this makes all you war-mongerers happy I know I abandoned the plans of annexing all those city-states, but you'll get your wars, relax to be honest, I have absolutely no idea when next update will come...let's say like this, if I haven't updated this before next Friday (not this Friday, remember) you can...roll me in tar or something.