Dean Martin and Goldfinger...a combo you don't see every day.Or at all even, plus i appreciated the oddjob reference.
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Very, very nice. 
That seemed very true to (what little I know about) Dean Martin. And the interplay between Goldfinger and Dino was funny: a bit like watching asymmetrical warfare.
That seemed very true to (what little I know about) Dean Martin. And the interplay between Goldfinger and Dino was funny: a bit like watching asymmetrical warfare. 
Fb-fb:
I'd like to. I'll admit, I am having a bit of trouble deciding which way to head first. I could take on the Venice/Savoy group and try and grab Tuscany, or I could head towards the Pope and Swiss, but that is a larger alliance that also includes Provence.
Great to hear! Not big on reality TV myself, though I will admit I watch one wildly popular American reality show...and no, I won't say which one...OK...American Idol.
o What do you want...I sing so it interests me. But I've seen enough gameshows over the years that hopefully I can keep the banter fresh enough. It's going to be a tough order, but I have some faith. It's early enough.
Arthur might be an excellent addition, especially as I can quote the entire film. Glad to see Jackie and the gang back in action. It's been too long.See Enewald...I'm not so stuffy and business-like all the time.What madness is this?
You were intoxicated whilst writing that, weren't you?
Mods can have fun too. And no, I wasn't drunk when writing that...well, not all of that at least. Some parts might have been, shall we say, inebriated. It's the wine, I tell ya!No, you certainly don't. I was rather surprised to see them together myself. And I had to add some Oddjob reference, even if it was clumsy. It's my favorite Bond film.
Excellent! I wasn't sure if his jokes would come across. He is such a smooth performer and his jokes slide right in and out of his songs. Though when speaking, nearly every line is a zinger.Very, very nice.
Looking at an update this weekend sometime and hopefully we'll get good and into the game. Otherwise, Goldfinger might have a heart attack.
Looking at an update this weekend sometime and hopefully we'll get good and into the game. Otherwise, Goldfinger might have a heart attack.
We couldn't be having that. Who would replace him....a Gallo? Saint Vincent of Saragossa?
EPISODE III
Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome your host…the man who pays double for everything, just because he can…Jackie Powers!!!
The audience breaks into applause as Jackie Powers rushes onto the stage and finds his mark. He bows a time or two and then stands smiling, allowing the wash of kindness fall over him. He finally holds a hand up gently to calm the crowd.
Jackie Powers: Here we are once again and we have a great show for you tonight. Welcome to another episode of Quest! And let’s get right to it because there is a lot to get to. Let’s say hello to our judges…
He bends low and sweeps an arm to introduce the judges’ stand as Goldfinger, King Midas and an empty podium are covered by the spotlights. Jackie walks over and does an intentional double take as he sees the empty podium.
JP: What’s this? We have a judge missing. (Looking to Goldfinger and Midas, neither of which gives him much of a response) Seems our third judge had another engagement this evening. But we were lucky enough to get a good friend of Mr. Dean Martin to help us out tonight…and we really do thank him. I’m certain this man knows his way around a drink…
A spotlight jumps dead center as it catches an aging but still hip Sammy Davis, Jr. strutting his way to his podium.
Sammy: Hey, man…I resent that. I don’t know my way around a drink…I know how to drink the thing down, man…and I mean that. (He breaks into a corny laugh and shoots his finger to King Midas.)
JP: Welcome, Mr…
Sammy: (Interrupting and pointing both fingers at Jackie) Babe…it’s Sammy.
JP: And we are pleased to have you, sir. (Jackie backs up and gestures to the other judges) Now a full panel and let’s go to our first judge to take a look at where we are in this quest…
Goldfinger: Quest?! More like a game, Bond. You’ll never take over the world with an outfit like this. I knew you were clumsy. I didn’t assume you were stupid as well.
JP: We’re not trying to take over the world, Mr. Goldfinger…our player is. (He smiles at the audience) Now what say you about the big board?
The screen rises as Goldfinger glares at Jackie Powers…
Goldfinger: About time, you pile of refuse. And take a look at that picture. It’s a good one. Those aren’t some imaginary neighbors. Those are real enemies to wipe out.
JP: Let me remind you, sir, of the agreement we had after last week’s…
Goldfinger: I agree to nothing. You want me? You get what I have to say.
JP: Very well, and what is that Goldfinger?
Goldfinger: He is wasting his time. A switch to land tech now? Why? He needs the infrastructure. That is the way to financial success.
JP: How about you, King Midas? What say you?
King Midas: I understand the concerns, but I think a move towards a superior army likely better now…these are nasty neighbors, as Mr. Goldfinger suggested.
Goldfinger: He who has the gold makes the rules, pal!
JP: But we aren’t after gold here, sir…how about you Sammy?
Sammy: Well I researched this picture, baby…and I’m seeing some excellent opportunities right there in that yellow area just south of Milan. I mean that thing is ripe for the pickin’, man. Those cats better look out because them’s some good eats, know what I mean?
JP: Quite, Sammy. Very astute. But let’s not lose sight of the diplomatic picture over all. Our Duke joins royal marriages with England and Castile. What to make of it?
Sammy: Good to have friends in high places, right man?
Goldfinger: (Looking confused) Um…yes, I agree.
King Midas: A smart move…you have a difficulty with that, sir? (to Goldfinger)
Goldfinger: I just wasn’t expecting…(he gestures towards Sammy Davis, Jr.)
Sammy: They never do, man…but that’s OK. We’re all cool cats in this game, baby. (He winks at Goldfinger and gives his corny chuckle again)
JP: And as he has said, Goldfinger…Tuscany does look inviting. I am surprised you haven’t mentioned it.
Goldfinger: I have not mentioned such a foolish plan because of the obvious concerns in Venice…to wit…(he points to the big board)
Sammy: I don’t see the problem, man. Just move on the thing and let Venice deal with their own baggage.
King Midas: Aren’t we conveniently forgetting Savoy?
Goldfinger: (He hrmphs before he answers) He’s right.
JP: When were you so lacking in boldness, Goldfinger?
Goldfinger: I’m a realist, Bond. I play the smart hand.
JP: Well then perhaps you’ll like this news…a new leader in Niccolo Piccinino arrives in Lombardia.
Goldfinger: (Suddenly cheering up) That is indeed good news!
Sammy: Now that is sweet!
JP: And then in November 1426, Milan reaches land tech 2. What say you now, Goldfinger?
Goldfinger: He wouldn’t have waited very long to get there. I stick by my point!
King Midas: But it does allow him to build level two fortresses, which must be a desired thing in such a place.
Sammy: Especially if the man goes to war. Those cats would eat his level ones in a heartbeat, baby. You better believe I mean that, man.
Goldfinger: Yes…but why doesn’t he build that very same fortress? Because he doesn’t have the money!
His spittle lands on Midas and the King backs up allowing Jackie to get in between.
JP: The fact is, gentlemen…the Duke only has 59 ducats. He needs 240. And he now decides…(he backs up gingerly)…to mint to get the money.
All three judges take a step back in shock. Before they can answer, Jackie Powers moves center stage and the spotlight shines only on him.
JP: We thought his would be a good time to bring out our special guest for the night. We’ve seen him before, but he’s got some new information to share so let’s all welcome Filippo Maria Visconti of Milan to the stage…
The Duke walks over to the couches, as usual looking slovenly and more than a bit annoyed.
JP: So, my Lord…may I ask about all this minting?
Filippo Maria: We needed the ducats, you know? Had to have the cold hard cash to pay for the defense of the realm. What kind of Duke would I be if I did not provide the protection?
JP: Well, as I understand it from the judges, you might be using those ducats for offense…
Filippo Maria: Nonsense. Do you see how Tuscany continues to recruit? That way is madness.
Goldfinger: (From across the stage) That’s right!
JP: (Holding a finger towards Goldfinger to stop him) Now just a moment…let us consider that Venice finally makes peace with the Ottomans here in 1427 at the cost of only 4 ducats but handing over Ionia to the Turk. Seems they may be down.
Filippo Maria: It is true that this leaves Tuscany at peace, but we have not yet provided for the fortifications any war with anyone, frankly, would require.
JP: And inflation is only just now starting to rise after nearly a decade…sitting at 1% at the start of 1428.
Filippo Maria: Yes, but look at this…(he points to the big board)
JP: Not bad, sir…
Goldfinger & King Midas in unison: Excellent!
JP: But let’s not lose sight of the larger budget…what do we have here?
Filippo Maria: I think things are doing well. We were sitting at about 196 ducats at that point and well on our way to that fortress in Lombardia.
JP: But what’s this, exactly?
Filippo Maria: (Sputtering) Well…uhm…
JP: I thought so. Forgot about that loan, didn’t you?
Filippo Maria: I…
JP: No need to explain. It happens to the best of them. In fact, perhaps it was a good thing that you were minting so you can make sure and pay off this loan, yes?
Filippo Maria: (Looking defeated) It didn’t hurt.
JP: Well I am afraid we’ve run out of time for the night…
Filippo Maria: (Shocked) Wait a minute…you didn’t even mention that Venice declared war against Serbia in 1428…all their allies joined…meaning Tuscany!
JP: We are out of time, my Lord…
Filippo Maria: We had a slider move too! One towards centralization!
JP: Your Grace…please!
Filippo Maria: We have the money for the fortress now! 1429 was a great year!
Goldfinger: (From across the stage) And Tuscany has 34,000 men on your damn border!!!
JP: Until next time, sir…we really must go…(Jackie Powers stands and looks to the audience)
Sammy: (Cocking his head towards Midas as he points to the Duke) Now that is one cool cat, man…
JP: Join us right here on…Quest!
Sammy: (Breaking into song as the credits roll) Who can take a sunrise…sprinkle it with dew…cover it with chocolate and miracle or two…
Heh, funny...
Tuscany is of the table then as a target for now? Maybe Savoy after all?
Tuscany is of the table then as a target for now? Maybe Savoy after all?
I say your gameplay suffers due to evil bankers always forcing you to loan huge amounts of gold that you then waste in one year, forcing you to save money ten years to pay the sum back.
Stop getting loans.
Kill the bankers.
Go into bankruptcy.
You need also more evil minions, aka vassals.
Stop getting loans.
Kill the bankers.
Go into bankruptcy.
You need also more evil minions, aka vassals.
I can see why the judges are divided - Italy is tough right now, with all those OPM and their enormous armies. I wouldn't have thought of fortresses, but perhaps FM is right. A beefed-up Lombardia will keep the doomstacks at bay.
Do you think the Serbian war will distract Tuscany and Venice enough for you to attack? Is Hungary involved?
Do you think the Serbian war will distract Tuscany and Venice enough for you to attack? Is Hungary involved?
The Candyman can!
Nicely done. A little harder for me to pin down what makes Sammy Davis, Jr. Sammy Davis, Jr, but then I don't know what his schtick was. Dino's a bit easier, in that respect.
I'm somewhat surprised to see that 10 years have already passed. Milan looks a little, dare I say it, timid (not that I would play any other way myself, but still, you've set yourself a rather ambitious goal, shouldn't the gameplay match it in sheer audacity)? Perhaps you should ask Joe Storey to guestplay a few rounds (and pick up the pieces afterwards)?
Good luck and go give someone or other some kind of hell sometime soon, okay?
Nicely done. A little harder for me to pin down what makes Sammy Davis, Jr. Sammy Davis, Jr, but then I don't know what his schtick was. Dino's a bit easier, in that respect.
I'm somewhat surprised to see that 10 years have already passed. Milan looks a little, dare I say it, timid (not that I would play any other way myself, but still, you've set yourself a rather ambitious goal, shouldn't the gameplay match it in sheer audacity)? Perhaps you should ask Joe Storey to guestplay a few rounds (and pick up the pieces afterwards)?
Good luck and go give someone or other some kind of hell sometime soon, okay?
Let Joe Storey guestplay? I don't know, man - you'll either own Italy, be broke or lose six wars while expanding your empire. Or maybe all three at once. Joe can dance on a tightwire, no doubt, but this situation might need a less, um, dramatic touch.
You've got to pick a direction and go, or wait for the alliances to lapse so you can pick up some friends. Or both. Ten years gone - and every AI minor can afford a bigger army than you. If you don't jump soon, you'll get pushed.
Bring in one of the Gallo brothers, or a famous wine critic to debate the merits of taking provinces according to the quality of the wine they produce. That should set Goldfinger off.
You've got to pick a direction and go, or wait for the alliances to lapse so you can pick up some friends. Or both. Ten years gone - and every AI minor can afford a bigger army than you. If you don't jump soon, you'll get pushed.
Bring in one of the Gallo brothers, or a famous wine critic to debate the merits of taking provinces according to the quality of the wine they produce. That should set Goldfinger off.
So this is The Quest. A great and funny AAR. And above all, while I wait for the next update I can just read the first part.
A beefed up Lombardia will only work if the Milanese army can both out manouver and complete sieges more quickly than an opponent that can throw thousands upon thousands of men in an assault. Nevertheless, I am sure that the mighty Milan will be questing soon..er rather than later.
I thoroughly approve of the nature of the quest but I am thoroughly confused by Corsica as a wine province.
You know, those anti-usury laws were there for a reason - the reason being, people didn't want to pay their loans back
You know, those anti-usury laws were there for a reason - the reason being, people didn't want to pay their loans back
