August, 801CE, Paris.
The rider who hustled into the dank of the Emperor’s sparsely decorated reception chambers could hardly have conveyed the urgency of his news better. His riding boots were dusty, and his eyes were bloodshot and seemed to loom out of his sweat and mud-stained face like a pair of menacing orbs.
It did not take the Emperor long to realise the issue was of great import, so he was unusually silent when he took the news.
“Our forces successfully triumphed over the Umayads in Tortosa, sovereign, though we suffered heavy losses, and our scouts report a second force mobilising near the borders of Asturias, as though to threaten the survival of that Kingdom in the hopes of dividing our forces. But the pathway to Barcelona is open for now.”
Karloman nodded, but his face remained set and grim. No man rode so long and hard as this one obviously had through the night merely to convey good news…
“Your son was badly wounded, sovereign.” The messenger finally blurted out. Unsure if he was saying it in an appropriate manner, but lacking the court etiquette or social skills necessary to think of any other way to do so. “The Crown Prince rode to save the right flank from collapsing during the battle and was speared through the side and fell from his horse. He also was wounded in the leg from a bit of debris after his mount bolted when his saddle was hacked off. He lies semi-conscious in his tent when I left, though his heroism rallied our forces on the right of our army, and saved the battle for us from there.”
Karloman said nothing for what seemed the longest of time, but his knuckles grew imperceptibly whiter as he gripped the edge of his chair with a fierceness that would’ve choked it if it had air to breath.
“That will be all,” the Emperor replied, in a low, deceptively calm voice.
The messenger bowed, with evident relief, and hurried out of the room as though afraid the Emperor might change his mind to have him strung up at any moment.
But Karloman’s mind had already forgotten the snivelling fellow who brought the news of his son’s injuries. As he rose from his chair and staggered towards his own chambers like he’d been heavy on the drink, his mind reeled, only one word echoing through his head.
Pepin, Pepin, Pepin,
His son and heir wounded, possibly dead by now if truth be told… there could not have been worse news.
By morning the word was all over the palace, and by nightfall the following day the terrible rumors spread throughout the city, some claiming the Prince was already dead, and the succession in chaos.
The Emperor shut himself within his suite, saw no-one, spoke to no-one, did nothing to quell the swirl of rumors or murmurs of intriguing lords jostling for the succession that swept the palace. His mind turned only to his son,
Pepin, Pepin, my son and heir, the one good I did in this world. The only one I have who never failed me. More precious to me than my brother, mother, father and sister combined. More precious than my Empire? Yes, more than that. I would kill the Empire itself to save him, if it came to that. Kill my own life’s work, for what good is work of such a scale without a legacy to leave? Without my son, what was it all for?
The Emperor’s suite had a small shrine, for private prayer and contemplation where a priest often attended to during the day so that it might be ready for use if trouble disturbed the Emperor’s sleep. He hardly ever used it, not being of a naturally pious inclination and preferring action to contemplation. And confession he usually regarded as something reserved for lesser beings. Emperors could not help but sin, he told himself, for they had to do a lot of killing, and killing was a sin, so all the monks would say.
But tonight, he felt the need for it…
He did not know how many days passed then, or how many meals he missed, but the food the servants delivered were returned uneaten, he ignored the reports of further victories in Hispania and listened with total indifference to demands from Brother Anselm, his favoured and most trusted Chaplain, that he must eat and then address the rumors swirling around the court. It seemed as though the Emperor was dead to the world. He even went unshaved, a mark of the level of his distress, for the Emperor utterly abhorred facial hair, which he felt unhygienic and grotesque.
In truth, weeks passed, and while it eventually became clear the Prince was alive at last hearing, he was reportedly unconscious, flickering back and forth from the threshold of death. Even reports that the army in Hispania had captured Barcelona and that a new mercenary force in the south had put the second army threatening Asturias to flight did not stir the Emperor to reveal himself, nor calm the dark, pensive, anxious mood that shadowed the palace during those few weeks.
For Karloman, only his mind swirled when his body seemed to sink into an immovable mound.
Is this the price? He asked himself constantly in those long weeks that followed.
Is this the price I pay Lord? For my triumphs, my glories? My conquests? All my sins and all those whose lives I took? Is this the price I pay, that you take my son from me? Answer me damn you!
But the Lord did not answer, if he even was capable of it. Nobody answered him, and on the rare occasions Karloman did sleep he found no peace, tormented by constantly swirling images of his father, his mother, his sister, his brother-in-law Ado, dead by a blade wielded at his command…
And Karl… at least it came to Karl… Always it came back to Karl.
My first crime, and my greatest one. My sin, my great fratricide. As Romulus killed Remus, so Karloman killed Karl. Is that why you did it Lord? Took my son to this pitiful place? To punish me for my sin? If one death is so bad, why would you prove it by threatening another? Is this what you would exact as your price for my sin? Karl’s death enabled all my glories and triumphs, so you would make them worthless by snatching my son to your gates?
The priests who found him the following morning where concerned to find the Emperor babbling about his long-dead brother and his son… talking as though God were present with him in the room, a trait Karloman had always previously ridiculed when he heard the occasional wild tales of others doing so, appearing for once quite demented.
“Bathe him and clean him up if you can,” Brother Anselm told them, knowing exactly the roots of Karloman’s distress. “Gently!” he emphasised.
The bath seemed to cool the Emperor’s fever, and though he remained silent and sullen, he seemed less insensible now. Anselm essentially swore the guards to secrecy over the state of Karloman’s health and ordered the suite doors be barred.
Then he entered to speak to Karloman.
“Sire,” he prodded Karloman, very gently. “More news from the south, your son still lives, though it’s not yet clear if he will recover. The army physicians are hopeful however.”
Karloman stared at him, a wild, untrammelled gaze in his pale eyes, like that of a wounded beast or boar. “Will you pray with me Brother Anselm?” he asked in a hoarse voice. “For once, will you?”
Anselm nodded, smiling his gentle grin. “Always sire. I am at your disposal and God’s.”
A bitter grin crossed Karloman’s face. “I don’t think he likes me much at the moment, truth be told.”
“You are God’s Emperor, sire,” Anselm insisted. “Anointed by the the Bishop of Rome himself, none more than you are favoured.”
“Pray with me then Brother,” the Emperor told him, “that his favour remains with my son.”
They did so then, but silently, and Karloman’s thoughts still swirled like a dark storm.
This then is your punishment Lord? Punish the death of my brother by the death of my son? Punish my sins by taking his life? That’s not right. Not right! It was my sin, the killing of Karl, it should be MY punishment, not his. Take my life if you must, not his. Spare him and claim mine, if a life you must have to pay for my sins. Did the Roman gods take Romulus’s children the way you seem to want to take mine? Or were they kinder, more forgiving? I know not.
That Karloman’s swirling thoughts barely made sense even to himself was something he was only dimly conscious of now. It was as though his mind and physical self were separate things now, and that his body performed the essentials of life by willing itself to do so of it’s own power, not because he wished it so…
For his part, Anselm was concerned about the Emperor’s request to pray with him. He never did it before, and it did not take a physician to realise the strain Karloman was under. He was even thinner and paler then usual, face taut and thin, gaunt almost like a skeleton, and his hair, so long a lustrous blonde, had gone grey and dull. He appeared to have aged years in weeks. Anselm knew the unusual request was important to the Emperor. He would not have made it otherwise, so he had accepted it without protest.
Spare my son Lord, Karloman was thinking now, over and over,
Take whichever life you must in return. My own if it please you, or my whole Empire’s, but my son must live. My. Son. Must. Live.
It felt useless to make demands of a deity, but the Emperor did it anyway.
“Will you hear my confession, Brother Anselm?” Karloman blurted out, not quite believing the words he used even after he said them.
Anselm, for his part, recovered from the shock rather quickly, though it manifested on his face for a brief few moments. “Of course liege, I live to serve and to forgive. Confess what you will.”
Karloman did so. It poured out of him like water from an upturned cup. He spoke of it all, left nothing out, even the details of his most sordid sins. Even the oldest, the deepest. Even what happened to his brother, the darkest, deepest and oldest of all.
Anselm listened, face impassive. He listened for hours and hours, until Karloman simply ran out of things to say. “Your sins are grave sovereign, and God’s forgiveness is equally great,” he intoned. In spite of Karloman’s fears, he did not seem shocked or recoiled. In truth, Anselm had heard similar confessions and worse for years. Did Karloman think he was the only one to have slain a brother, or an enemy in anger, or dishonored a parent? He was not of course, so what might have surprised a man not in the priesthood would not have surprised Anselm, and did not.
“It is not my place to forgive, but God’s, but I have listened Lord, and I believe your repentance to be sincere. If God is willing, I believe he will spare your son. If he does pass from this life, it will not be on your account.”
The door burst open then.
“Sovereign! Sovereign!” the guards came running into the room.
“News from the south!” another cried, rushing in.
Karloman’s face went white, drained of almost all it’s blood. “Yes?” was all he asked, voice a strangled whisper.
“Your son sire!, Prince Pepin has awoken. Prince Pepin is alive sovereign! He is alive!”
Karloman’s reaction to this news was one that deeply shocked every man present for the rest of their lives. Not a one of them would ever forget it for every day that passed in the future of their own lives. It was imprinted on their memories forever the moment that Karloman, Emperor of the Franks and Romans fell to his knees seemed to sway back and forth for several long seconds… and unmanned himself, weeping uncontrollably. Guge, heaving, wracking great sobs that shuddered through his entire body…
He wept, and wept and wept and wept. It took a shocked Anselm almost a full ten minutes to recover him to a state of sensibility.
“My son,” Karloman whispered, his voice hoarse and his smile forced through dry, cracked lips. “My son lives…”
.
OOC:
I thought it best not to keep everyone waiting.
This last post was a more personalised, character narrative one than some of the others, and there'll be a few of those coming up, but don't worry, I'll be covering the rest of the Iberian conflict as well
![Smile :) :)](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)