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The Return of Väinämöinen -Karelia AAR

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This is hilarious. My favourite?

finn said:
Members of that weird cult, who eat flesh of and drink blood their own god, start to revolt in Novgorod. I never trusted to those people. They are evil spirits who eat little children at night, so we hit wooden stakes through their hearts and kill them.
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Aimo should really get rid of that sulking wife of his. It is quite obvious that she is unable to produce an heir worthy of Karelia. And Aimo should know that the only explanation for that can be that she is an evil witch, and that if anything is clearly high treason. Off with her head :cool:
 
GregoryTheBruce: It's incredible that my bastards are actually much better than my only legitimate son. Usually it's other way around. And Aimo's wife is a lovely lady. I wouldn't dare say anything bad about her.

bowl of soup: I remember that poor Alp had more than his share of trouble. :D I'm glad you like this.

J. Passepartout: Heh, I combine in Aimo most paranoid views about Christianity any Pagan author ever used. Total reverse of the stuff I write in De Gesta.

Gladstone: Actually I doubt that Aimo dares to do anything to her. I have a feeling that Aimo is afraid of her. But she really is a lovely personality.
 
Olaus Petrus said:
because my late grandmother is more dangerous than these Poles.
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Is she a vampire? :rofl:
 
I have too played as Karelia and I noticed they are the strongest tribe of Finland. When I quit playing I had conquered whole Finland, Estonia and Sweden and my eastern border was in the Urals.
 
Omstart, lisää runolaulajia! The proper circulation of your the Karelian would be by poetic singing, of course. Those birch bark documents you mentioned were protective spells if I remember right, probably so as to be effective even when not being read aloud.

I heard a story from my girlfriend (who has been working summertimes in a centre for Kalevala and Karelian culture, Juminkeko in Kuhmo) that still such news stories as the sinking of the Titanic were circulated in poetic form by singers in the Karelian villages.

No offense, but hopefully we'll get to see some Karelian asses kicked by the good old Isäntä of Bothnians later in the game :rofl:

I guess there is something special to storytelling in the Finnish-Karelian soul, as I still find the time to enjoy AAR's like this despite never having played CK myself (and generally not playing anymore)

Center for Kalevala and Karelian Culture - Juminkeko
 
I saw a link to this AAR somewhere and am very much pleased to have found it. A good, humorous account! I'm wondering if it's dead now, as there hasn't been a recent update?
 
SirGrotius said:
I saw a link to this AAR somewhere and am very much pleased to have found it. A good, humorous account! I'm wondering if it's dead now, as there hasn't been a recent update?
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It's not dead, but summer has been busy time for me. I'm trying to find time to update this week.
 
Kurt_Steiner: No, she's just dead and bit rotten.

JMJ: Karelians can become strong if player has skill and luck. You seem to have both, but I might not be as lucky in the future and skill I lack.

Happy_Lonely: I have Karelian ancestry so naturally I favour them over Ostrobothnians. The Karelian is reference to newspaper Karjalainen.

Boddhi: I'm glad that you liked it.

Hullu Hevonen: There are too few Finnish AARs. So I hope this can fill part of the void.

Update coming in next 30 minutes.
 
Novgorod.jpg


I decide to become Prince of Novgorod, because I want to show those Ruskies how great I am. People of Novgorod elect me to their prince and in the coronation ceremony their archbishop describes me as the most pious and Christian lord. I doubt that the huge amount of gold, which I accidentally left to a table when I left the room for a moment and which disappeared while I was gone, did have anything to do with this.

Hell.jpg


Terho asks where we come from. I tell him that according to those who worship dead god we are demons from Hell. I'm not certain where that place is, maybe it's near Sweden.

People of Beloozero are soon quick to elect me to their prince. Although I don't like the way they look at my purse.

Urho-1.jpg


My son Urho has become a skinhead. He is constantly babling about how Karelia belongs to Karelians and how we should kick everyone else out from there. I don't understand what he has against bears and moose, because no one else besides them and us lives here. I marry him to loose Estonian girl to see if it calms him down.

Sampo.jpg

I become father of yet another bastard. How many loose drunken wenches there can be in my realm?

Voitto.jpg


Voitto claims that he is king of the all Finns and that he wipes his ass with the Karelians. I become really mad and attack against him, just to find out that he was talking about the newspapers. And thus I became king of the all Finns.

Finland.jpg


Urho2-1.jpg


I move south and leave my skinhead boy to take care about the bears and moose. He can't be allowed to more civilized lands, like beautiful Karelian Isthimus where I found my new drinking hall.
 
He should be proud of his bastards...a sign of his virility.
 
JimboIX said:
He should be proud of his bastards...a sign of his virility.
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I think he is becoming desperate for being the father of such fine sons. Besides his wife doesn't like this at all.
 
A bastard son... a skin head mad-for-killing son... what is going to come next?

A cardinal? :D
 
Finally Aimo returns. It seems that things are going well apart from one little thing... Aimo really needs to get a new wife, one legitimate heir is a bit on the low side, a spare prince would be a good thing.
 
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