AARtaly

[Exterous]

Exterous walked into his new office. He looked around. It had nice wooden pannels and a large desk close to the back with a nice big chair behind it.

"This will do nicely."

He set down his briefcase and started to unload his things. He started pulling sandbag after sandbag out. After about the 12th sandbag, he decided it was time for a break. Inside his breifcase he found his laptop. He picked it up and walked over to the desk whistling. He set it down and began merrily typing away.

*knock knock

"Come in!"

Exterous walked in.

"How are you?"

"Good, and yourself"

"Good."

"What can i do for you?"

"Nothing. just wanted to welcome you to the area." said Exterous

Exterous: "Thank you." He went back to typing.

"Another AAR?" asked Exterous.

Exterous nodded.

"Can you do that?"

"Huh?"

"Well, it is your fourth and you haven't even finished your third!"

"Its winding down and i wanted to start another one."

Exterous nodded.

The lights suddenly flickered. The sky got darker and it started to rain.

Exterous looked around "Hmmm, weather seems a bit not too nice."

"This is a bit unseasonalbe."

The door blew open and a dark figure in a black trenchcoat walked in, dripping water.

Both Exterous' looked at him "What can we do for you?"

The figure stopped, and slowly removed his sunglasses. "You can DIE!"

Both Exterous' gasped. "The Anti-Exterous!" the shouted in unision.

Anti-Exterous nodded.

Exterous ran into the room "Hey guys, whats with the...ACK! Not you!"

Three more Exterous ran into the room and skidded to a halt when they saw the dark figure. They shouted as well, which drew more Exterous into the room more and so on.

A lone Homer walked into the room. "Hey guys!"

Exterous #5,128: "Uh....wrong show."

Homer: "Do'h!!!" and the fat yellow man walked out.

Anti-Exterous cleared his throat. "Now, down to business. You can't write an AAR with all Exterous in it!"

"And why not?"

"It will get to confusing."

"It will not."

"I agree"

"Me too"

"What he...i mean I said!"

Anti: "I cannot allow this to happen."

Exterous: "And waht

next Exterous: "are you

"planning to"

"do about"

"it?"

Exterous looked around "We are too many for you! I will make a grand nation out of me!" There was a chorus of 'wooting' from the mass of Exteri

Exterous nodded. "Yes, with my mass Exteri army i will rule all and all will bow and woot to me!"

Anti: "That is what i came here to stop!" And with that he reached out and touched the nearest Exterous. When a particle and its anti particle touch there is a realease of energy, an explosion. The same happens for an Exterous and an Anti-Exterous.

The resulting explosion whiped out all of the Exteri.....well, most of them.

There were two hidden behind the desk. One turned to the other. "Well, there goes plan A."

The other nodded. "Guess we'll have to do things the old fashoned way. Want to be my aide?"

"Ummmmm, how about one of your generals?"

"Ok." They shook hands.

"Now we just need to find some more people........"


***********

My new AAR will involve Italy and I promise screenshots! Now taht i actually have time on my hands I wil try to do a good job of mixing them in with my AAR. As usual, it will be interactive. If no one wants to interact or only a few, that might change (and this might be closed down) But i would like to add another AAR to my sig

Some positions to fill:

Head of army - Jopi
navy - Easily Confused
air
Intel - String
Propaganda - Nikolai II
A FM or two (or generals)
FM elbasto
FM Semi-Lobster
Gen Black_Rattler
A soldier or two
Lurken/Morpheus/Mr. G 24

Captain Coats (don't have a role for you yet)

Or anything you really want i will try to work in. Let me know!

 

[unmerged(18893)]

Looks promising, but how do you make the AAR as a title in your sig, as you can see the one in mine dosn't took to attractive.

 

[unmerged(23624)]

cool start

 

[Exterous]

Looks promising, but how do you make the AAR as a title in your sig, as you can see the one in mine dosn't took to attractive.

URL=http://www.europa-universalis.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&postid=2091983#post2091983]
Exterian Czech AAR (Still under construction)[/URL]

after the ] place whatever text you want there and then add the [/URL]

 

[unmerged(18893)]

Thanks alot

 

[Exterous]

black rattler: no prob
********

Exterous looked over the reports of his generals. Gen Exterous (GE)looked on with interest.

"Hmm, it would seem that we have a problem here."

GE: "I agree."

"Summon my generals."

"Yes sir."

5 min later they all arrived at the same time.

Exterous: "I would like you to all notice that you got here at the same time. That is a problem."

The generals looked at eachother in confusion

Exterous continued "You see, my panzer leaders should have arrived first, my logistics wizards with organized reports for me and my old guard last."

His generals were now nodding in understanding.

"That would have happened if any of you had any traits. This...yes?"

One of his generals had raised a hand. "I have a trait! I am a spotter!"

"Good for you General Ambrosio."

"I see ships from far away."

"Yes, indeed a good choice for a land commander. Now, I can't have this, so we will all draw for your traits out of a hat. All except Exterous. He gets offensive, panzer and fb cause he is....well, he is me and I like my ego trips. No one else will have more than 2 and most will only have 1."

Exterous passed around the hat. Everyone took a piece of paper from the hat. When they were all done: "Any questions?"

A Mj Gen raised a hand "Yes?"

"What does it mean when your paper is blank?"

"It means i was too lazy to give you a trait."

"Oh" He went and pouted.

Some of his generals looked very happy with their new traits. Geloso sat down, barracaded himself with sandbags and started meticulosly doing his TPS reports. Bernardi ran off shouting "BLITZ IN AN ORGANIZED FASHION!"
while Guidi simply ran off shouting offensive remarks.

Others looked dissapointed or simply confused, esp all his Field Marshalls. One walked up to him "What can i do for you?"

"I have a question about my trait sir."

"Shoot."

From the corner, GE said: "Bang!"

Both Exterous looked at eachother: "Ahhhh" both hit hands, made fists, hit them up down, togehter, smacked hands, grabbed thumbs and said "Psshhhh" at the same time. "Thats why i keep you around."

"You know it buddy!"

"Sir, my trait?"

"Ok...."

"Well, see for yourself." He showed Exterous the paper.

Exterous read it out loud " 'whiny girl' And whats wrong with that? You go into battle whining about marching and the weather, then that the enemy isn't fighting fair and then complaining that you have to retreat through the mud. Now, go on your way."

He looked unconvinced, but walked out of the office anyway. The next one came up to him "And whats your trait"

"Uh, head chef?"

"Oh good, your my new cook. The kitchen is that way."

Again the officer looked dubious, but headed to the kitchen

"Next?"

"'Jerk on a cell phone?'"

"Sure, you talk on it while waiting at the chashier's and hold everyone up, have it ring during a movie or class and look annoyed when people try to talk to you while your on it."

The officer nodded. He took out his phone and flipped it open: "TIFFANY! Oh my God, you'll never guess what Susan did to her hair! Yeah, i know, like it totally doesn't look as good as mine....." his voice faded off as he walked away.

Exterous turned to Gen Exterous: "That was a good draw!"

GE nodded emphatically.

"Next?"

The rest of his FMs just stood their.

"What? none of you have any traits?"

They all shook their heads no.

"Hmmm, musta gotten the lvl indiactor wrong. Is 3 a FM or is it 0? I can nver remember. Oh well."

One of the officers spoke up: "What do you plan to do about getting experienced field officers sir?"

Exterous thought about it for a second. "I think i have a plan. You are all dismissed." All the officers but GE walked out.

GE: "I think it will work, but the bloodshed...."

Exterous turned around. "I think you have gone weak. Your lack of faith disturbs me. They are after all, sub-Exterous."

"Still....."

Exterous raised his hand and GE found it hard to breath. GE raise HIS hand and Exterous found it hard to breath. So Exterous hurled bolts of electricity at GE with the other hand. GE stopped them with his free hand and hurled them back.

Then, suddenly it was over: "This is pointless"

"Agreed."

"Freinds?"

"Of course."

They hugged.

GE: "We still have a lack of volunteers from the audience to participate."

Exterous: "Patrience. Post screenshots and they will come."

GE: "Perhaps we should do that."

"Tomorrow."

GE nodded "Tomorrow......."

 

[String]

*points at the intel position, then at himself*

I wanna I wanna I wanna

 

[Semi-Lobster]

Another AAR by Exterous! !!!
I hope this one kicks as much ass as the others!

 

[Jopi]

Me! Me! Take me! What could be more respected position than the Chief of Army of Chick... I mean, Italy?

 

[Exterous]

Exterous turned to Jopi, his new chief of army.

"Alright here is the plan."

Jopi rubbed his hands in anticipation. "We take Ethiopia NOW!"

Exterous slapped Jopi "Fool! We have no experienced officers."

Jopi rubbed his face

"You will only attack with a few divisions at a time and try to draw out the combat as much as possible."

"But sir! The cost of lives!"

Exterous slapped him again. "Yes sir, right away sir!" Jopi ran out to do as he was told.

String ran into the room in a near panic "SIR! I have grave news!"

Exterous: "What is it my dear intell officer?"

"The Brazilians! I have uncovered secret plans that they intend to invade us in 1957!"

"Egad!" Exterous fainted at the thought of facing what the 3 div Brazilian army might become in 21 years.

5 min later

Exterous was sitting up in his chair now. "Gather my cruisers!" He thought for a second "And my transports too!"

5 min later Exterous gazed over his mighty cruiser and navel fleet. His intercom buzzed "Sir, Gen Ambrosio reports an enemy fleet offshore of 15 CVs, 82 BBs 1 Crusier and 921 Destroyers."

He pressed the button "Tell him thank you for his vigilance." He let the button go "Ha, if by that he ment 5CAs 3 CLs and 5TPs."

3 inf and 2 cav divs loaded onto the TPs. Jopi came in again. "Should we put our new traited gens in command."

"FOOL! They will go command in Ethiopia. Send some of my crap gens with them."

"Sir!"

The navy departed and arrived at Brazil around Jan 20th. The invasion went quickly and smoothly with only minor combat involved.

Rome:

*Buzz "Sir, Ambrosio reports a Brazilian fleet near Oman, consisting of 2 BBs and a handfull of DDs sir."

Exterous laughed.

Straing ran in "Sir, our submarine fleet near oman has been defeated by the Brazilians!"

"WHA??!! What are they doing here?"

String shrugged. "Have them retreat to Napoli and start some sub research. If we lost to the Brazilains, just think of what the British will do."

String looked at him

"Uh....i mean....if they attacked us first."

String nodded and left.

Soon the empire of Brazil was added to the Italian Empire.

Exterous: "HA! Lets seem them fight me in 1957 now! Having no army or navy or airforce and being part of my country! HAHAHAHA!"

String came in: "Sir we have taken no provences in Ethiopia dispite heavy fighting."

"Good, good. No change of orders for my commanders there."

 

[String]

clearly this is the greatest AAR ever

 

[Lurken]

Can I be a lowly soldier? It would be fun to work with such a legend as you Sir. Mighty Exterous.

 

[Morpheus506]

Ah, he is wise... the screenshot came, and now I come...

I don't care what I am, just as long as I get to fight stuff

 

[Exterous]

Morpheus walked up to the front lines. He was very annoyed. He ahd been deployed with the Italian forces in Brazil and had hopped for some action. But he had seen no fighting. None. Nada.

Now he was in Ethiopia. He had heard ther were month long battles fought here. Time for some action.

He leasurly walked down into a foxhole to see who his new buddie was.

"Hi I'm Lurken."

"Names Morpehus." They shook hands. "Much action around here?"

"er....kinda. Lota angry yelling back and forth, but not much killing."

From far side of lines: "You moma was a hampster!"

Lurken: "You so fat you can't reach they keyboard to type!"

"Oooo, vicious war over here."

"Yeah, it ain't so bad."

"Get your peanuts! Get your peanuts here! Wouldn't be a war without peanuts!"

Lurken: "Hey vendor overhere! I'll take one and one for my new buddie here!"

The vendor tossed 2 bags of peanuts over and Lurken tossed him some coins. He hadned one bag to Morpheus. "HEY! Thanks man!" He started to chow down.

"Peanuts! Popcorn! Get your popcorn! Get your....ACK!!" There was a short burst of gunfire and the vendor went down.

Lurken scrambled for his gun "Dang it! The only perosn who dies in the last 10 hours and they had to kill the vendor! B@st@rd$!!!"

Morpheus looked around again. Definately wasn't in Brazil anymore.

 

[Nikolai II]

Any room for a lazy fat (or thin) guy sitting around in the 'home front' whining about .. well, anything.

Either that, or propaganada.. er.. propagandhi.. er.. propagandad.. er.. lying.

 

[EasilyConfused]

Could I possibly be your subservient Naval Chief?

 

[unmerged(18893)]

As the first one to reply I think I deserve a spot in this AAR.

 

[elbasto]

Clicks "suscribes"

 

[unmerged(15561)]

Bloody hell! Ive got competition....!

The Captain is at your disposal. Ive always wanted an appartment in Rimmini!

Youve taken Brazil already....! I guess this is Italys secret plan to stop Brazil (and the rest of Sth America) being the most successful soccer team in the world by stopping them winning the world cups when they take place!

Oh oh! Here comes Anibal.

 

[Mr.G 24]

uhh can I be in your AAR, that is as anything if not well just keep up the good work.