Life2.0 - An "Of Unity" Narrative (Completed)

[CBR JGWRR]

"Into The Wilds, Part 13”
30th Naomi, 10 (2188)
Buri Of Unity​

Eventually we stand.

It is time to put sabres to the jugular.

The ramp drops before us, the mountain that hides my blood-enemies looming large. My wife takes my hand as we walk to the edge. Our daughter joins us. Together, we embrace as a family.

Together, we jump. My wife and I set our viewscreens to see each other.

Bullets rise as we approach, but they plink off at best; their real anti-air capability has already been knocked out. B'Turna falls this day.

We pull the parachutes and glide towards the cave entrances that lead to their final fortress, and meet scattered resistance that steadily gets denser as we approach. We land half a kilometre out, and travel the rest while skirmishing through the forest.

We come to where the trees have been cleared - the cave entrance is fortified and guarded.

My wife lies on her side to pin them down with a rifle, hidden in the tree line by bushes. My daughter and I use her fire to cover our advance, and we sprint across the open ground, and punch through the wooden wall at the middle.

Rivkah takes the left side, I take the right, and Naomi picks off the ones who stand up in their distraction. Soon my wife is joining us again.

Her voice is on the comms as she runs. "Scarlet One to Imperatrix-Actual, we are in position."

We wait for the reply, and take up defensive positions.

Alexandra replies. "Copy Scarlet One, reinforcements en route. Standby for breach."

We enjoy the rest while we can. We will secure all the entrances into the mountain, and only then advance together to ensure the enemy cannot escape except where we want them to try. Hundreds of teams like ours are operating both above and below ground to encircle the mountain.

My wife sets up a monitor. Roughly two thirds of the above ground entrances are secure, but the fighting is thick in places.

It's several hours wait; we are joined by a company of Mopish cave-skirmishers and Kyaese mobile infantry. "Imperatrix-Actual to all, we are drawing the noose."

My wife looks at me as she holds her stomach. Her helmet retracts. Her pain is worse. "Buri, I'm getting contractions."

 

[CBR JGWRR]

"Into The Wilds, Part 14”
30th Naomi, 10 (2188)
Buri Of Unity​

I have a lot going on here.

We look into each other's eyes. Hers are showing so many emotions.

I recall Duxanek's lessons on pregnancy for Humans; Naomi won't actually start giving birth realistically until tomorrow. But a battlefield is no place for a woman in labour, she has to be returned to the colony. But, if she goes, then there will be no peace except through the imposing of submission on the enemy.

I hesitate. But I must ask. "Are you sure it's the start of labour?"

She turns around, activates her armour release, and steadily climbs out to stand to one side. There's fluid inside the legs and a puddle in the feet. The scent is a mixture of urine, sweat and beneath those, another scent I don't recognise. She looks back at me. "I didn't realise earlier."

Rivkah frowns. "Mum, how could you not know?"

Naomi shrugs. "I've been sweating from exertion all day because we've been busy, and I couldn't exactly leave the armour and go pee so I had to just let it go... It's only now the contractions are starting to get regular that I realise just how far along it is."

I look at her crotch. "May I?"

She tilts her head, not quite sure what I mean, her hand running over her bump. "What, now?"

I smile. "To check your dilation."

She looks around. This is very uncomfortable for her... I look at the rest of them. "If anyone watches this, I will tear their eyes out."

Everyone turns their back to us. Sometimes it's nice to have a reputation. Naomi sighs, then squats with her legs apart.

I do what Duxanek taught me to do, then we return to stood upright. "Naomi, you have to go back to the colony."

She nods. "Yeah..."

Alexandra calls. "Imperatrix-Actual to Scarlet One, what's your status? You're falling behind."

Naomi looks at me. "Ah."

I reply. "Donkey Leader to Imperatrix-Actual, Scarlet One requires medical evac to colony."

Alexandra's voice is now very stressed. "Imperatrix-Actual to Donkey Leader, what is Scarlet One's status?"

I have no idea how to say this in military code. "Labour has begun."

"Donkey Leader, medical team is en route. What is the plan?"

I look at Naomi. She winces hard as another contraction takes place. "Naomi, what should we do?"

"Buri, every moment we delay makes it possible for the B'Turnas to escape. I will be waiting for you at the colony. Go."

Rivkah looks at us. "Should I go back with Mum?"

Naomi looks at me. "No. Your Dad needs you more Rivkah."

Rivkah looks at me. "What do you think Dad?"

I embrace Naomi, and nuzzle her. "I love you."

"I love you too. Go. I'll be ok."

"Donkey Leader to Imperatrix-Actual. Plan B is go."

The others look at me. I lift my minigun, then point into the cave. "We give these slavers no quarter. Weapons free."

I start down the tunnel. I take one last look at my wife, feeling ripped in two as the warrior in me seeks my enemies in the darkness, and the husband in me is torn by walking away from the light. Every step feels heavier than the one before. The worry of leaving her is tearing into me... I look back at her. She leans on a wall, her face turning redder.

I think to myself. What would she do if the positions were reversed?

I look at her again. She calls back to me. "Win. Bear the guilt. Reign."

I nod. "Donkey Leader to Imperatrix-Actual, I am in command."

I turn back to the tunnel.

I summon the rage.

I roar.​

 

[HistoryDude]

Well, that's terrible timing. Let's hope it doesn't affect the destruction of this foolish Xenaya clan too much.

 

[Macavity116]

Yeah, what HistoryDude said. The timing is absolutely inopportune. I'm very worried for the safety of both Naomi and the baby. The medical battalion I work for has a horror story we tell to new recruits about the time a British soldier gave birth at a Forward Operating Base in Afghanistan at the hieght of the war. It's a horror story for good reason.




Also, I've had a funny thought: If I had a nickel for every time a Stellaris AAR featured a main protagonist being pulled off the battlefield because she went into labor, I'd have two nickels... which isn't a lot but it's weird this has now happened twice.*
*The Stormbreakers - A Stellaris Story, Chapter 31

 

[CBR JGWRR]

Well, that's terrible timing. Let's hope it doesn't affect the destruction of this foolish Xenaya clan too much.

It shouldn't; it's reduced the diplomatic options for ending the conflict - the whole reason Naomi was going in despite being seven months pregnant woman was in hope of achieving a peace settlement.

But it's very inconvenient for Naomi.

Yeah, what HistoryDude said. The timing is absolutely inopportune. I'm very worried for the safety of both Naomi and the baby. The medical battalion I work for has a horror story we tell to new recruits about the time a British soldier gave birth at a Forward Operating Base in Afghanistan at the hieght of the war. It's a horror story for good reason.




Also, I've had a funny thought: If I had a nickel for every time a Stellaris AAR featured a main protagonist being pulled off the battlefield because she went into labor, I'd have two nickels... which isn't a lot but it's weird this has now happened twice.*
*The Stormbreakers - A Stellaris Story, Chapter 31

Yes, it's very bad timing. And there's a lot of complications with Naomi's pregnancy too, and well, for Naomi the nearest surgery unit is on the other side of the ocean. Still, they'll do their best.

 

[CBR JGWRR]

"Into The Wilds, Part 15”
30th Naomi, 10 (2188)
Naomi Of Unity​

I lean on a tree, cradling my womb. A few Kyaese women have stayed behind to help me. Which I appreciate, but Kyaese are egg-layers; they've got even less experience giving birth than I do.

Situation?

Well, there's a five word Old Earth expression that begins with that word which seems highly apt.

On the bright side, I'm in a scenic natural setting. It's warm and my cervix is fully dilated which means that the baby is on their way. All good things.

The downside is I've just tasked one of the Kyaese to make a knife glow red using their flamethrower. Being cut open with no pain relief will be agony until I lose consciousness, but as said we have no pain medication, no surgical equipment, no disinfectant, and my baby isn't safe to attempt vaginal birth because their augmented skull will break my pelvis.

Solution? Use an implement that will cauterise the wound to do the C-section with.

Breathe. The more I think about it right now, the more I want to try vaginal birth. Being two months premature helps, the child won't be full size, so maybe they will fit through my pelvis and not break me.

Or is that just me being afraid of having a piece of glowing metal slice me open?

Stay positive.

I will be meeting my firstborn child soon. Gosh this hurts.

One of the Kyaese gives me a ration pack. I hadn't realised how hungry I was... It's been an intense day. Ow. Breathe.

Remind myself that with each contraction meeting my baby comes closer. Breathe. I gently walk around. I break a branch to lean on, then go to the radio. "Scarlet One to Angel Leader, status?"

"Standby Scarlet One, enemy have engaged in scorched earth tactics by detonating high explosives to collapse tunnels on advancing forces, and all medical transports are engaged. We hope to be with you by nightfall."

"Understood Angel Leader." Damn... I have a Kyaese send a message to the Holocron to call up mining Neumanns. Duxanek won't be attending me any time soon. Ow.

I go back to leaning on the tree. My child, I love you, but I really can't wait for you to be out of me.

Breathe.

Keep up, keep walking. It helps align the baby, and I need to make sure you come out aligned properly.

I wonder what happened to those people that the enemy collapsed caves on... Would our armour have held up? Ow. Breathe.

You know, I've just realised that I can't remember which point is it that I should start pushing. I've dilated, so this is the second stage, right? Ooh, that one was uncomfortable.

My contractions are way too frequent. That's worrying. Maybe it's just that - ow - I'm taking so much longer to think, and I'm not realising the time?

The trouble is, I don't know what to expect... Every woman is different, and the child is a genetically engineered one...

Breathe.

I can do this.

I move down the tree and squat. It'll open my pelvis up better, and I need that if I'm going to get through labour. Check my cervix again. Can't feel my baby yet.

Breathe.

I'm going to be ok.

I think I should push. Close my eyes. Ow. I can do this. It's going to be ok. We're going to be ok.

 

[CBR JGWRR]

"Into The Wilds, Part 16"
30th Nomi, 10 (2188)
Buri Of Unity​

I am grateful for the backup of Kyaese.

The enemy has realised that they had no hope of stopping our advance in the open, and so, they have retreated to where they have advantages.

In fact, they have left just one passage open to assault; the rest are now filled with rock and broken bodies. More warriors have fallen to my enemies than fell to MSI's Flagship, a fact that further incenses my wrath against them. Now, we fight.

I turn another passageway, following the paved path laid down through the limestone caves. Musket smoke hangs in the acrid air, lungs burning trying to scrape what little oxygen remains, their lives futile against my armour as they choose death in a bid to give their leaders precious seconds. They hide in airlocks, they hide behind slaves, they hide in cracks and crags, behind stalactite and stalagmite. And I flush them out, and then their gore runs down my horns and sabres.

And my little flying friends give me oxygen tanks and new paths through the rock, and assistance when the enemy is too numerous or too far, and garrison where we conquer.

Hour after hour I have chased the scent of my enemy down these underground warrens.

Eventually I give up, and consult our sensor systems. Another hour leads me to here.

An underground city, built on the banks of an underground lake. The Kyaese immediately provide air support, and guide me to their last holdout. I chase down some of their stragglers, and Mopish infantry begin sweeping to free slaves.

I charge to the marketplace where they make a last stand; debris litters the floor where barricades have been hastily erected. Two volleys of musket-fire slam into my armour, the third shattered by Kyaese counter-fire. They close ranks behind improvised wall pieces.

I raise myself to full height, and roar. "B'Turna! You snivelling coward, hiding behind the deaths of your allies, come! Face justice!"

A mere boy approaches.

Rivkah Of Unity

Um.

He's cute.​

 

[Macavity116]

A mere boy approaches.

Rivkah Of Unity

Um.

He's cute.​

And just like that, the war was lost.

Seriously, though. This got a loud laugh out of me.

 

[HistoryDude]

That ending was amusing. Let's hope he is coming to surrender...

I highly doubt Naomi will want to do this "genetically engineered child" thing again... although I wonder how the new kid will get along with Rivkah...

 

[CBR JGWRR]

"Into The Wilds, Part 17"
30th Naomi, 10 (2188)
Rivkah Of Unity​

I'm in a really awkward position.

He's not far off as tall and muscular as Dad, but his fur is almost pure white. And I find myself wondering what colour fur our children would have if I let him mate with me, with my biological parents black fur. Which is crazy because I've never imagined anyone mating with me before.

Focus. Stop looking at the loincloth, it's embarrassing. Besides, it's not that time of year.

Wish I could talk to Mum about this.

Calm.

The guy is dead anyway, he's timidly backing away from Dad.

Which isn't surprising given how much blood is soaked into Dad's fur from where he's been goring people all day.

He looks at me, then Dad, then back to me.

He doesn't want to die. He pleads. "Wait, I can explain-"

Dad pins him to the ground. Part of me wants to hear him out, or wonders if this is a trick by the real B'Turnas to stall for time and throw Dad off the chase. I mean, he can't be more than twelve, why would MSI take him?

I stand beside Dad, while a Kyaese medic runs a DNA test. Other Kyaese are accepting surrenders. "Dad, maybe we should hear this."

Dad looks at me out the corner of his eye, not moving his sabres from his prey's neck. He doesn't say no. The medic is still completing the analysis. I talk to him. "Who are you?"

Dad moves just enough so that he can speak. "I'm Doki B'Turna. I was taken as a hostage to ensure the loyalty to MSI of my father, Fumi B'Turna."

"And you decided to carry on the family business here on Unity?"

"My Dad ensured a few of his people came too." He smiles deviously as his eyes flick above us. Then gasps as blood pours from his throat as Dad executes him. I look up.

We're surrounded. And the Kyaese have already flown off to start evacuating slaves. There's too many to count of them, but we've got modern gear.

The medic bolts into the air, Dad and I reactivate our helmets as we leap at them, the musket balls bouncing off. That would have been a lot of headshots. Dad punches straight through two of them, I spear a man through the hip on my horns before swinging him off me into his fellows. I'm three times stronger in the powered armour, and their muskets are useless, at best we'll only get light bruising.

One of them swings their musket at my face as a club, another tries to ram a bayonet at my knees, a third has leapt on my back... We've got to regain the advantage here or else we'll get dragged down. The one on my back leaps off involuntarily as I activate an electric discharge, I spin to avoid the stab at my knees while sweeping my broadsword low and take the musket right in my jaw. I'm glad I pulled my tongue back as my teeth bash together hard. He's off balance and I skewer him having switched from the low sweep into a stabbing uppercut. I turn on the one with the bayonet to find he's trying to push a body off that my Dad threw at him. I finish him with a slash across the throat.

Others are starting to retreat, but the medic has gotten air support back, and the retreaters are downed by rocket-propelled grenades.

One of them - a big guy, covered in metal armour - turns and charges us. I turn and point out my sword and brace for impact. A Kyaese rocket blasts just behind his feet sending him off balance; instead of impaling him I'm smashed aside and through a barricade. My arm is trapped by debris, and he's on top of me. His face is all rage and fury until it goes into shock; he rolls off and I see the pole Dad has rammed through.

He helps me up.

We won.

The place is a mess now, but Kyaese are carrying out records and maps and freed slaves. The medic reports back about the DNA test matching the data from the slave ship.

I wonder how Mum is doing?

 

[CBR JGWRR]

"Homo Xenaya"
1st Buri, 10 (2188)
Rivkah Of Unity​

We get back to the clearing where we left Mum.

She's easy to find, just follow the screams of agony. We sprint to her, then get out the armour so that we can treat her.

Her face is purple with effort and pain. Blood is all the way down her legs, and she's abandoned trying to stand up to deliver.

Dad kneels beside Mum. "What can we do?"

She breathes between syllables. "They're... stuck... on... my... pel... vis."

Dad moves his hand to feel for the baby. He looks at her. "The wrong side of the pelvis too."

Mum nods. "Buri... snap... my... my..." She collapses back down. Dad looks at me. He's so afraid. I gulp air. "Where's Duxanek?"

Dad begins feeling up Mum's body to work out exactly where the baby is. I kneel beside him. "What do you think?"

"I'm hoping the baby isn't stuck."

"They... are. Have... been... hours..."

Dad finds the baby's head. He pushes. Then shoves. Mum lets out a horrifying scream as she moves backwards. Baby is still stuck. Dad leans back. Then looks at me. "Hold your Mum's shoulders."

I gulp again, and brace. Mum is terrified. Dad pushes hard enough he lets out a groan, never mind Mum's screaming as her body bends between me and Dad both pushing on her with all our strength.

Still stuck. Dad lies next to Mum. She nuzzles him as best she can. "You... have... to... snap..." She struggles to lift her hand to point at her hips.

Dad takes hold of Mum's pelvis, trying to get a hold on the bones. I can't watch. He looks at her face. She breathes, and nods. Then closes her eyes. I think about what Dad told me about my biological mother, how she died in childbirth. Am I about to lose my adoptive mother too?

The roar of a turbine engine distracts us. Duxanek and a team of medics jump out while the helicopter lands. Dad sprints to them, they talk as they come back to us. I look at Mum. "Duxanek is here, it's going to be ok."

They load Mum up and take her back to the colony, putting her under general anaesthetic before she's on the helicopter.

It's a horrid flight thanks to stressing about Mum, but as dawn breaks a little ball of dark brown fur timidly pokes his head around the corner. Dad smiles. "Come here, my son."

The ball perks up, and leaps. "Dada!”

Dad lifts him. Mum is wheeled in - she's dimly awake, and smiling. The baby tries to cuddle both of them. I join in. I poke him gently. "Hey little bundle of fluff."

The baby smiles as he looks at me. "Wivka."

Mum holds him to her breast. "Welcome to the worlds, my little one. You will know love, and you will know hate. You will know joy, and you will know pain. But you will forever be, our Ruki, of Unity."

 

[CBR JGWRR]

And just like that, the war was lost.

Seriously, though. This got a loud laugh out of me.

It amused me too.

That ending was amusing. Let's hope he is coming to surrender...

I highly doubt Naomi will want to do this "genetically engineered child" thing again... although I wonder how the new kid will get along with Rivkah...

It's safe to say Naomi will be content with just one daughter and one son.

Ruki doesn't know Rivkah as well as he knows Naomi and Buri - he's already had lots of time listening to them. Being already walking, talking and able to extrapolate the identity of his sister despite being two months premature are examples of his vastly enhanced capabilities; even now he's roughly equivalent to a Human two year old.

 

[CBR JGWRR]

"Celebrations"
2nd Buri, 10 (2188)
Rivkah Of Unity​

Aunt Alex supervises Ruki drinking from a milk bottle, while Dad gently dances a slow waltz while carrying Mum. Both are in the clothes they wore to get married, although Dad has obviously put on a bit more muscle mass as his suit tears in places where he moved. It's Mum and Dad's eighth anniversary, plus Ruki's birthday celebration, plus celebrating that Mum survived and that we liberated more than twenty thousand slaves.

It's been a crazy week.

Ruki comes to me, and climbs up my leg up to my shoulder. Then hugs my head. "Wivka."

I hold him up. "Hey little fluff nugget."

He smiles as I ruffle his fur. He's definitely got Mum's hair. It's not like Dad's fur, his has been silver and thick all my life, but instead it's thin and wiry like Mum's when she has her braids undone. He's probably going to have braids all over when he grows up. He starts wriggling again, so I put him down.

He scampers off. Climbs Dad, then feeds by hanging down from his shoulder onto Mum.

It's weird how dextrous he is. I wonder if he even can get dizzy.

Dad lays Mum on a reclining chair and Mum rests. Ruki settles in her lap.

Dad gets glasses out. "Our family has had lots of big moments this week. And I am glad things can all settle down again. Here's to the tenth year of our colony being a nice, safe, sensible year. It would be nice to just be a normal family again."

Mum is first to laugh. "We wish."

Ruki looks at Mum. I look at Ruki.

I wonder if he's worked it out yet.

Uncle Thando walks in with a large cake. "Buri's right. Let's just enjoy this moment."

Ruki looks at the cake. A devious little smile forms as he jumps for the cake. Mum yells in pain from Ruki pushing off her, Thando spins to protect the cake, and Dad drops the glasses to catch Ruki.

I can't help but laugh. "Oh well, we didn't want the glasses anyway."

HK moves off the wall, throwing his hands in the air. "Statement: this is the most dysfunctional of all HaMaadimi families I've worked with."

The Holocron drags him back in. "Nope, Tipheret and Tipheret were much weirder."

HK pauses. "Conciliatory statement: in consideration, yes, they were."

I look around. Three humans, one droid, two Xenaya, a genetically engineered hybrid and a former hologram. I smile. "The main thing is, we are family."

 

[CBR JGWRR]

"Augments"
2nd Buri, 10 (2188)
The Holocron​

I sit with my great-great granddaughter. "How exactly do you intend to train Ruki?"

She looks at me. "I can train the body, but the mind I'm not sure as he should grow to be so far beyond me. Already I see hints of Mum in him."

"He's developing quickly."

"Me and Buri started the mental development program while he was still in the womb. But it's more complicated than I thought."

I look down at the child. "He hasn't yet learned to compartmentalise his brain when sleeping then."

"No. The problem I've got is I'm trying to remember Mum's lessons."

"HK and I taught Tipheret and Atalyah. We can help you."

She nods, before picking up a tablet with her notes. "He's developing differently to how the models anticipated."

I review her data. "His kinesthetic sense is extremely well developed."

"He freaked Alexandra out earlier, when you had to sort something down in New Bulawayo."

"What happened?"

"Thando let him play with his throwing knives."

I fold my arms. "That's..."

"Very Thando."

"Indeed. What happened?"

"Kid was catching the knives perfectly after Thando showed him how. Normal child would have been stabbed all over."

I remember HK training her mother. "Atalyah could react quickly enough to catch a bullet."

Her eyes widen. "I didn't know that."

"It's things like that which are why Ruki should learn from us. Soon, before he settles for operating at a baseline level."

She sighs. "It would be nice for him to get a childhood."

"We both know we need Ruki operating at his true potential. It starts now."

She mulls it over. "We'll start tomorrow."

 

[Macavity116]

"He's developing differently to how the models anticipated."

Ah yes, a very normal parenting experience.

"Thando let him play with his throwing knives."

I fold my arms. "That's..."

"Very Thando."

Swiftly followed by the typical Naomi and Buri parenting experience. XD

 

[CBR JGWRR]

Ah yes, a very normal parenting experience.

Probably one of the few normal things about Ruki, that.

Swiftly followed by the typical Naomi and Buri parenting experience. XD

It's a good thing they're adaptable parents. Especially for Thando.

 

[HistoryDude]

Ruki is finally born and already learning warfare!

It's a shame that Rivkah's first romantic interest was a terrible sapient being. Hopefully she has better luck later... (also, I don't think Into The Wilds, Part 17 is threadmarked)

 

[CBR JGWRR]

"Beginnings Of A Prince"
3rd Buri, 10 (2188)
The Holocron​

I look at my ward. Three days out of the womb, but already able to match children several years older. "Ruki, do you know what you are?"

He sits. "Different."

"True."

"I look nothing like Mum."

"That's because you were designed. You are the peak of over a century of research in genetic engineering and computer science. You are the son of Naomi, who is a normal Human. Naomi is the daughter of a Human named Atalyah who was a second generation with your mental and physical upgrades, while her mother was an augmented clone of her mother who viewed herself as a continuation of Tipheret. And I am the Holocron left by your great-great grandfather. At this stage Ruki, you are barely able to understand what your capabilities are. You are also Xenayan; your parents wanted to look like your father Buri. He was a chief on his world, son of a chief named Ruki."

He nods. "My head hurts."

I come down to his level. "It will. Already you are roughly the level of a six year old Human in terms of your mental capacity, and every day that passes adds more growth."

"When will it stop?"

"The downside of your genetic engineering is that you are a pioneer Ruki."

He trembles. "You guys don't know."

"Correct. But we all love you. Hundreds of people from half a dozen species worked on making you possible. We will support you through everything."

There's a long wait. "So I'm a prototype."

I pick him up. "Ruki, to me you are a grandson. To Naomi and Buri you are their son."

"So they love me no matter what?"

"Yes. And as part of that love, they've asked me to guide your studies so that you will become all you can be."

"So what am I?"

"In one sentence, you are a baby hyper-intellect. You're already on the level of children a few years older than you, and by the time you are an adult, very few beings in this galaxy will be on the same level as you."

"What if I don't want to?"

"Evaluate your options Ruki."

He tips his head back. He's working it through. "I'll learn."

"Wouldn't you like to know what you will learn?"

He frowns. "I already know."

I indulge him. "Go on?"

He folds his arms. "Mum is queen, and I am therefore a prince. Therefore, I will be king one day, and you guys are shaping me to be that king already."

"Yes."

He processes the possibilities.

 

[Macavity116]

He folds his arms. "Mum is queen, and I am therefore a prince. Therefore, I will be king one day, and you guys are shaping me to be that king already."

"Yes."

If he bursts out in a rousing chorus of "I Just Can't Wait to be King" I swear to Jericho I will toss this kid into the nearest Astral Rift.

 

[CBR JGWRR]

If he bursts out in a rousing chorus of "I Just Can't Wait to be King" I swear to Jericho I will toss this kid into the nearest Astral Rift.

Naomi and Buri wouldn't be very happy if you did though.