Road of Queens - CKII India AAR

[Chac1]

How many capes can she give her husband? He must have quite the collection by now.

So far everything was going great. Good food, good wine, monkey attack. But bad news was coming….

And what exactly is in that cake?

Not to mention, where were the pugs when the monkeys showed up?

 

[Eurasia]

How many capes can she give her husband? He must have quite the collection by now.


And what exactly is in that cake?

Not to mention, where were the pugs when the monkeys showed up?

All the capes.

The Pugs are busy guarding the St. Bartholomew Honey Cake. Which is what that cake is.

 

[Bullfilter]

Menumarotid

Sounds like something you need an ointment to get rid of!

Attack pugs were there, of course, to keep people in line.

Good to see them back.

Then it was time to exchange gifts and she gave her husband his brand new cape. Well, refurbished cape.

A lot of talk about capes … is he now the Caped Crusader King?

 

[Eurasia]

Crusader Kings 2 - The Road of Queens
Chapter One Thousand-One-Hundred-Forty-One : Stupid Interruption!

This chapter opens early January, of the year 953 AD, with the Basilissa Eulalia enjoying her wine, her pastries, and watching the monkeys annoy other people.

Then a Courtier approached her with a sealed scroll from one of the Spymaster’s agents. She sighed and hoped it would not be bad news. It was bad news. And late news on top of all that.

Seems Bhikkhu Nikephoros of Para-Lauhitya had become the NEW Leader to Increase the Imperial Council Power. Which was weird as he wasn’t ON the Council. And he liked the Empress.

“Why give me bad news during a feast?” murmured the Empress. “This is wrong. So wrong.”

The Imperial Factions were always hovering in the back of her mind. Poking her. Teasing her. Upsetting her. Waiting for her to show weakness.

​

The darkest night of the Diwali Feast finally came. The guests celebrated Hope over despair, good over evil, and light over darkness. Mostly with singing, drinking, and eating sweet pastries.

Soon the feast was over and the guests left with napkins full of leftovers. And a few hangovers.

The Empress was pleased. Outside of the bad news the party had gone well. Still, now she had to go back to business Dealing politics and Vassals and family. And lots of paperwork.

 

[Midnite Duke]

New faction leader is actually leader because previous one has dropped out or died (preferably). Thanks for the update.

 

[Eurasia]

Crusader Kings 2 - The Road of Queens
Chapter One Thousand-One-Hundred-Forty-Two : Tiger Hunt!

This chapter starts in mid January, of the year 953 AD, with the Empress looking up information on Raja Dahamsena of Sinhala.

He was still too young to marry, he was eleven, and the Empress was still waiting to see if he could marry her Heir and granddaughter.

Simonis Dysnomia, at the age of eighteen, was almost an old maid. And she was ugly to boot. She needed to marry soon and start pumping out babies!

The Empress, half bored and one hundred percent drunk, announced a Tiger Hunt!

He husband, Basileus Arenios, turned to her when she announced another Tiger Hunt and said, “I thought you said you would stop hunting tigers?”

“I would never say that!” she replied.

“We have witnesses!” he pointed out.

“In the corner!”

“You can’t put me in the corner!” he responded. “I am your husband!”

He ended up in the corner.

As the Servants prepared the menus, Soldiers sharpened their hunting spears, and the Hunters debated where to hunt for tigers the Empress received a few letters of rejection.

One was from the Count of Monyul.

The other letter was fron Doux of Magadha who had also refused to join the Tiger Hunt.

The Empress wasn’t pleased but figured that just meant more food and booze for the her and the Hunting Party.

Soon the wine was packed, the hounds selected, the Imperial Elephants ready, and the Hunting Party was off!

Soon they arrived at the site picked by the Hunters. The tents were put up, the cooking fires started, the Imperial Guards stationed to protect the camp, and the Empress readied herself to kill a big cat.

 

[Midnite Duke]

Where art Lord Meow-Meow with a pride of monkeys to protect the tigers? Thank you for the update.

 

[Bullfilter]

Don’t hurt the big kitty!

 

[Eurasia]

Crusader Kings 2 - The Road of Queens
Chapter One Thousand-One-Hundred-Forty-Three : Letter For You Ma’am!

This chapter opens on the 12th of February, of the year 953 AD, with the Empress coming back from another day of wandering around the jungle and finding nothing.

Only to find a tiger in the camp site being feed by some of the cooks.

“Kill it!” she screamed as she jumped up and down on the Imperial platform which was on her favorite Imperial Elephant, Bob the Tenth. “Kill it!”

“Oh we can’t do that,” said one of the cooks. “Against the Code of the new and improved Messenger Guild.”

“What do you mean?” the Empress stated as she climbed down and gestured at her Imperial Guards. “Kill it! This a tiger hunt! That is a tiger!”

The Imperial Guards just shrugged their shoulders. “We can’t kill a messenger. The Guilds, well former Guilds, were pretty upset about all the ones they lost lately.”

“What?” questioned a confused Empress.

“Well, after all the birds and other animals that disappeared,” said one of the Guards with a glance at the cooking fire out of the corner of his eyes, “the Guilds got together and formed one big Messenger Guild to protect the owls and otters and ducks from being eaten. Had a bunch of laws passed and all that. They also decided to train some bigger animals for the job. Tigers, rhinos, elephants, whales.”

“Whales?”

“It’s a work in progress,” he replied. “Anyway the tiger brought you this letter.” He handed it to her while the other Guards posed with the tiger to get their image quickly drawn.

The Empress sighed and broke the seal of the Imperial Council and unrolled the scroll. The news on the scroll was old. No doubt because the stupid big cat had taken his time. Visiting taverns, having large meals, and billing it to the NEW Messenger Guild.

Seems Exarch Hrodgar “The Good” of Kham had made the Doux of Nyingchi his Seneschal.

This was worthless information. No doubt sent by the Council just so they could hire a tiger to delivery it and piss off the Empress.

This wasn’t likely but at this point the Empress was REALLY pissed off and half-drunk. So she was willing to believe anything bad about her Councilors at the moment.

Also she was sure the tiger had stuck its tongue at her when nobody was looking.

“KILL IT!”

Nobody listened to her.

 

[StrategyGameEnthusiast]

Also she was sure the tiger had stuck its tongue at her when nobody was looking.

“KILL IT!”

Nobody listened to her.

She better be careful, the tiger might turn out to have a taste for human flesh.

 

[Bullfilter]

Tigers, rhinos, elephants, whales.

Waiting for a yeti, woolly mammoth or even a velociraptor to be employed next.

the other Guards posed with the tiger to get their image quickly drawn.

“KILL IT!”

Nobody listened to her.

Good.

 

[Midnite Duke]

Congratulations on your seventh birthday! Lord Meow-Meow is the union steward of the new messenger guild. At over seven years of AAR and less than two hundred years of game time, you are approaching @El Pip's levels of magnificent pacing. Thank you for providing income for a needy tiger family.

 

[El Pip]

At over seven years of AAR and less than two hundred years of game time, you are approaching @El Pip's levels of magnificent pacing.

If it had been two hundred years of actual time and seven years of AAR then perhaps he might be getting close. But this is still faster than real time, indeed I would estimate it as 300x faster paced than Butterfly Effect.

Come at the King, you'd better move incredibly slowly.

 

[Eurasia]

Come at the King, you'd better move incredibly slowly.

 

[Eurasia]

Crusader Kings 2 - The Road of Queens
Chapter One Thousand-One-Hundred-Forty-Four : FAILURE!

This chapter opens in mid February, of the year 953 AD, with another tiger messenger.

As much as the Empress wanted to kill the tiger the letter it brought was good news. Seems Count Dan of Dulan finally disbanded the Independence Movement. Maybe because he liked the Empress? Or maybe his wife pestered him until he disbanded it?

Then a THIRD tiger showed up with another letter. Who the Guards refused to attack. And this time it was BAD NEWS.

Doux of Magadha, the jerk, had joined the Faction to make Prince Niphon the Emperor of Maurya. Maybe because he hated the Empress? Maybe because of his wife pushing him to take control of his life or something weird like that?

The journey back was horrible. Every town the Hunting Party went through gave them the cold-shoulder. And when they finally reached the Palace/Castle the populace refused to even come out of their homes to greet the Empress. Even the pets seemed to avoid the Empress and her returning Guards, Hunters, and Servants. They were untouchables! And not in the good way. In the BAD way.

She had failed. With THREE TIGERS in the very camp she had stayed in she had somehow failed! She blamed the Guilds. She blamed her Guards. She blamed the Cooks. She blamed everybody but herself.

 

[StrategyGameEnthusiast]

Tigers bringing letters? No wonder the guards don't want to attack them.

She blamed everybody but herself

Something makes me think it was her fault.

 

[Midnite Duke]

The last sentence was very telling. Thanks

 

[Eurasia]

Crusader Kings 2 - The Road of Queens
Chapter One Thousand-One-Hundred-Forty-Five : Barracks

This chapter opens in late February, of the year 953 AD, with the Empress deciding she needed to upgrade her military. Or at least try to increase it.

So first she focused on her Castle of Kamarupanagara. Its Barracks could be upgrade. It would cost almost half her treasury.

But she decided to pay it.

The Temple, Madan Kamdev, had Militia Quarters that could be upgraded.

She decided to upgrade it. Though it almost drained the coffers completely. Almost.

Her husband pointed out that the money she had been building up had meant to be used to create a Grand Works.

“No, it wasn’t,” replied the Empress.

“I am sure that is what you planned to use the money for,” Arsenios stated.

“In the corner!”

As her husband sighed and went to stand in the corner she also pondered changing her Focus. Business was so boring…

Family! Family was important! She decided to focus on bringing family together. Before she died of old age or some killer stabbed her in her sleep.

“If we are all about family now-”

“Stay in the corner!” the Empress said.

Her husband sighed.​

 

[StrategyGameEnthusiast]

Family! Family was important! She decided to focus on bringing family together. Before she died of old age or some killer stabbed her in her sleep.

“If we are all about family now-”

“Stay in the corner!” the Empress said.

Her husband sighed.​

So the husband isn't family then? Or the Empress just wants to have her idea of bringing family together.

 

[Midnite Duke]

Family is of shared blood (dynasty). Marriage with a mouthy dolt does not mean family. Thanks