The Basilissa really did not want the Mongols in her family, she only wanted to keep them from dying out. Thank you
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Crusader Kings 2 - The Road of Queens
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-One : I Got To Have A Party!
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-One : I Got To Have A Party!
This chapter opens halfway through October, in the year 936 AD, with the Empress being very, very, very, very, very bored.
So she decided to have a party. Technically she was celebrating the seasonal feast, the Diwali, but everybody knew she just wanted to get drunk and make fun of her guests.
She decided to get her husband a cape. Don’t men love capes? Maybe with a hood! He can sneak around and look cool.
As the Castle/Palace prepared for the party there was some interesting news.
Seems Doux Bhogishwar “The Wise” had imprisoned a LOT of people. Mostly kids.
Then the Mongol Empire was banishing another Pagan. Weird.
She was so happy when the guests started to arrive and were greeted by dancers, freshly baked pies, and chilled drinks. Maybe her Court would allow her to enjoy herself and stop telling her about events happening outside her Realm.
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Nope, I can not see the Empress giving her husband anything. Being able to spend time with the Empress, should be the greatest present that anyone can receive. O Action Reporter, are you reporting from the red carpet or from the kitchen. Thank you for your fearless reporting.
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Crusader Kings 2 - The Road of Queens
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-Two : Party Political Games
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-Two : Party Political Games
This chapter opens in late October, in the year 936 AD, with the Empress trying to have fun.
But even as she suggested a game of tossing daggers out the windows at passing subjects the Courtier’s brought her some news from Mongol.
Seems the Khagan had released another person from his dungeons. This time a Lowborn member of the Orthodox Church. The man, named Stephanos, had fled to the Byzantine Empire.(1)
After a few drinks under her belt, and accidentally hitting one of her own paintings with a throwing axe, the Empress had a good idea on how to stop the fighting in the northern lands. Tell Tishifan to stop and make peace with Mew!
“This is such a good idea! Bring me my pen and some fresh paper! The good paper! Not the paper we use in the privy!”
And so she sent a request to Tishifan to surrender to Mew. She giggled as she signed it, sealed it, and sent it by carrier duck.
Funny enough the young boy, not wishing to be placed in dungeon in which he might never escape, turned down the idea.
The Empress was enraged and tried to join Mew on his war to crush the kid.
But she wasn’t allowed to. Stupid lawyers!
So she sent the Protostrator to arrest the Traitor.
But that was, once again, not a legal choice. Damn the lawyers!
So the Empress sent her Spymaster. Mew seemed a tad worried about sneaking into the enemy’s territory. But, on the other hand, he was being asked to help kill his enemy. How could he refuse?!?!
And so while her guests drank and ate and danced the Empress sent out the order to kill Tishfan of the Kham Revolt.
“May his death be cleaner than the one he gave his own mother in his dungeons!” she hissed as she signed and sealed the order.(2)
Funny enough there was no end to those willing to help kill the little brat. In other words almost everybody in the region.
And I mean everybody! Exarch Danujmadhava of the Pala Kingdom, Doux Vasudeva of the Kumanchal Raj, Doux Ioannikios of Tosali, Major Ioustinos of Sutrapur, Count Sonpal “The Ill-Ruler” of Mustang, Bhikkhu Anthimos of Madan Kamdev, Exarchessa Jodhabai of the Patola Sahi Kingdom, and Bhikkhu Sabas of Dhakeshwari Jatiya Mandir.
“Wow,” remarked the Empress on seeing the list. “This kid is dead.”
Then it was time for the exchange of gifts. Turns out her husband loved capes and was really happy with his gift.
Then the Courtiers brought her some news again. But this time it was good news.
The Training Ground in Laksmanavati had been finished finally.
“Well, that’s good,” she remarked as she refilled her mug with more Greek imported wine. “Such news is welcome.”
Then they brought her more unwanted, and slightly older, news. Akkadevi Bana was released from the dungeons of Doux Bhogishwar “The Wise” of the Bhar Raj.
And another child had been released by the Mongol Empire. How many people were in the dungeons of the Mongol Empire?
Finally the height of the feast was reached. The darkest nigh of the Diwali had approached. Candles and lamps were lit and guests celebrated with wine, pastries, and songs.
By the end of November the party came to an end. As there had been no monkey attacks it was decided by all that the feast had been a pretty good one.
The Empress happily went off to bed to sleep the sleep of the hung over.
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Author’s Notes:1. The Orthodox Church had been known as the Eastern Orthodox Church so as not to confuse it with the Catholic Church. But with the collapse of the Catholic Church there was really no reason to put ‘Eastern’ in the name. In fact there was a debate if the Byzantine Empire should take back the name ‘Roman’ Empire and tell the Pope to go hang himself.
2. Who was also her Aunt and, therefore, Tishfan had killed a member of the Imperial Family.
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Is Tishifan the Brat a cousin of the Empress? Their actions share common features. Thank you for the party invitation but without monkeys and elephants, something is missing.
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Crusader Kings 2 - The Road of Queens
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-Three : Becoming A Woman
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-Three : Becoming A Woman
This chapter opens in late November, of the year 936 AD, with more news coming from outside the Realm. Again.
Another person had been released from the dungeons of the Mongol Empire. This time a person of the Hindu faith.
“What was he doing in the Mongol Empire?” the Empress asked her Imperial Court. “Are other Realms trying to convert the populace of the Khans into other Religions?”
The Imperial Court shrugged.
By then it was also noticed just how many people were happy to kill Tishifan. Wow!
By December more people were released from the dungeons of the Khagan. One was a Christian named Sati Menumarotid. The other was a Slavic Pagan named Demid Stanislavovich. Which enforced the idea that the Mongol Empire was having Religious issues.
It was also reported that the Slavic Pagan was scarred and was malnourished.
Then Gauri Bana was released from the dungeons of Doux Bhogishwar “The Wise”. Why had she been in jail at all? Because she was the wrong Religion or because she was a dwarf?
She also received a very weird request from Doux Lomapada. Seems the idiot felt the Empress OWED him the County of Bikrampur.
Of course she not only refused this request but also suggested such greed was beneath him.
About a week later Bhikkhu Anthimos of Madan Kamdev reported that Tishifan would have a “tragic” fall. The Empress was pleased.
Then there was news that Doux of the Kumanchal Raj had his Nobles pass the Levy Focused Noble Obligation Law.
“Can’t you people stop bothering me with news I don’t care about?” asked the Empress. “Can’t you let me recover from my hung over state?”
The Imperial Court wondered about that. Surely she would have recovered by now?
Then the Empress was told that her daughter, Ioustina Dysnomia, seemed to trust everyone. The Empress tried to push her daughter to be Charitable. Which worked!
This was a good thing. For Ioustina became an adult at the same time and a Dutiful Cleric to boot.
And now it was time for her to marry.
“Did I arrange this marriage or was it forced on me by a favor I owed?" the Empress asked her Imperial Court.
The Imperial Court shrugged.
She wasn’t sure about the arranged marriage and tried to change it to a matrilineal marriage but Count Bosporios turned that idea down. He wanted a normal marriage.
She tried to break the arrangement and even invited a single male to court. To try to marry him to Ioustina. It failed.
As she struggled to find a way out of the arranged marriage, a marriage likely forced on her before she became Empress, she received some good news.
Bhikkhu Ajmal of Dhaili seemed to be developing a good opinion with the Empress.
In the end realizing that she could not get her daughter out of the arranged marriage, and being in a slightly better mood, she agreed to the marriage.
It didn’t matter. The Empress still had a stolid control over the Duchess of Varendra. Who would be the future Ruler of the Realm.
And so the new year started with mixed news.
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Why did you care whether it was a Patri or Matri marriage? It was a double Dysnomia marriage. Empress, it is five o'clock somewhere. Have two Mai Tais (made extra strong) and call in the afternoon. O gracious chronicler, you do have your hands full with the Empress. Thank you for the update.
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Crusader Kings 2 - The Road of Queens
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-Four : Marriage And Murder
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-Four : Marriage And Murder
This chapter opens in early January, of the year 937 AD, with the Empress receiving a reply from Count Bosporios of Suvarnagram.
He had agreed to HER suggestion to marry Ioustina. The Empress, who had tried to get out of the agreement, snorted on reading the letter.
So Ioustina soon left the Imperial Court to marry her new husband.
The only funny part about the whole thing was Duchess Eupraxia II of Varendra, the future Ruler, happened to be the Count’s Liege. Witnesses suggested they could barely stand each other.
“He better watch himself,” the Empress murmured about Count Bosporios. “As a member of the same family she might decide he is threat to her titles….and…well. Things happen.”
Even funnier Eupraxia II’s liege was the Exarchessa Jodhabu of the Patika Sahi Kingdom. And while this woman had a high opinion of the Empress her relationship with the Duchess and her other vassals were not as good.
In other words the Count had some very powerful women above. He better watch his step.
Then in the middle of the January there was good news. And bad news.
The good news was that Tishifan of the Kham Revolt could not fly. Or, least he flew like a brick from one of the walls of his own Castle. But the killer who pushed the boy babbled. Babbled like a brook.
Which meant that the Empress was a known Kinslayer, a known murderer, and that would likely damage her reputation.
But she didn’t really care much. Past Rulers had become known murderers and still stayed on the Royal, and later Imperial, Throne without an issue.
So we close this chapter with the murder of a teenager and the, hopefully, end of a Revolt.
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For most people being a known murderer and a kinslayer would be a hit to the reputation. But for the Basilissa, it is just another day at the office. Thank you for continuing to report on the Basilissa, but please be careful.
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Mainly good news.
At least it was only a familial kinslayer, barely worse than a parking fine!
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Familial is second strongest. -4 diplomacy, -20 dynasty opinion, -5 general opinion is a hefty parking fine. Also, the only one that may be earned outside of dynasty with the killing of a first cousin.Mainly good news.
At least it was only a familial kinslayer, barely worse than a parking fine!
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Blah. She'll just kill people till morale improves.
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Whatever the penalty, one must brush it off with nonchalant bravado.
That’s the spirit!
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Crusader Kings 2 - The Road of Queens
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-Five : One War Down….
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-Five : One War Down….
This chapter opens in mid January, of the year 937 AD, with the ending of the Kham Revolt.
Seems the death of Tishifan meant there was nobody to be its leader or to keep it organized.
And so the conflict in the northern part of the Empire came to an end.
Exarch Mew “The Whisperer” of Kham was back in charge. And seemed to have a MOSTLY high opinion of his Liege. Though….he seemed to be upset about her being a murderer. Kind of strange to be upset with her for killing his enemy. But hey…what can you do.
It was unknown why his wife was in jail. Then the Empress did a little digging and found out she had been…well…fooling around.
The Empress wasn’t sure that justified being put in the dungeons but who was she to judge?
Then the Empress examined the southern border of the Empire on the Throne Room’s Wall Map and sighed. Peace there was not. The southern border, and part of the western border, was burning with combat.
She turned to one of her Courtiers and said, “How can I go to war when my own Realm is at war?”
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When one is maybe giving you lovers' pox, to the dungeon they go. Thank you
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Crusader Kings 2 - The Road of Queens
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-Six : Counting Her Enemies And Her Friends - Part One
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-Six : Counting Her Enemies And Her Friends - Part One
This chapter opens in mid January, of the year 937 AD, and the Empress was thinking about making two lists. Those Vassals who she could not trust. And those Vassals who she could somewhat trust.
In other words to go over the lists of most of her direct Vassals and see who were ‘Enemies’ and who were ‘Friends’. So she could know who would fight on her side and who would fight against her.
At the top of her list of ‘Friends’ was Duchess Eupraxia II of Varendra. Her daughter and the future Ruler. The girl had a very high opinion of her mother.
The only issue the Empress had was the person who was the Duchess’s Regent.
Count Bosporios of Suvarnagram, who was the Empress’s Cousin and Son-In-Law, was also the Regent of Varendra. What bad luck. It didn’t even look like he and the Duchess liked each other.
At least the Father of the Duchess, and many of the Empress’s children, still had a high opinion of the Empress.
Then there were the Nobles to the north. Exarch Mew ‘The Whisperer’ of Kham had a very high opinion of his Liege. For a loony.
His skills as a Master Spy made him feared throughout the lands. Add his holdings, wealth, and military forces and he was a powerful ally.
Then there was the, still fresh, Exarchessa Jodhabai of the Patola Sahi Kingdom who, while not a Spy Master, had a great military, good social skills, and was also loyal to the Empress.
Funny enough, Bhikkhu Niphon of Para-Lauhitya, was also very loyal to the Empress.
If you know the history of this region and that title you would understand while I say it is ‘funny’.
Doux Ioannikios of Tosali, she oldest son, loved her. And she had a good opinion of him. Even if he was a tad smelly.
And some of the less powerful Vassals also had a high opinion of their Liege.
Doux Vasudeva of the Kumanchal Raj had a high opinion of his Liege and he wasn’t even Greek!
Then there was the Count Sonpal “The Ill-Ruler” of Mustang. Who owed the Imperial Family the fact that he still was in power. So he had a somewhat good opinion of the Empress. And he was a member of the House Ayudha!
Still, the ‘Friends’ list seemed small.
Next chapter we ponder the ‘Enemies’ list.
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This chapter ran longer than I envisioned and you did not even mention her mirror as a friend. The enemies list may be several chapters unless you use a higher threshold than for friends. Thank you for sticking close to the Basilissa as a canary in a coal mine for the rest of us.
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Crusader Kings 2 - The Road of Queens
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-Seven : Counting Her Enemies And Her Friends - Part Two
Chapter Nine Hundred-Thirty-Seven : Counting Her Enemies And Her Friends - Part Two
This chapter opens in mid January, of the year 937 AD, with the Empress now examining her ‘Enemies’ list.
Of course at the top of the list was Doux Lomapada of Tirabhukti. The man who refused to stop plotting against his own Liege.
But he had some problems. One he was in debt.
Two, he was losing a war against the Great King Vidurathpala III of the Ayudha Kingdom. The result of which might mean his imprisonment or, at least, a decrease in his Prestige. Either way he would likely look bad in front of his own vassals and people.
In other words he might end up taking himself down by his own actions. But there were others on the list.
There was Doux Bhogishwar “The Wise” of the Bhar Raj. A depressed, scarred, warrior who disliked the Empress. But was also busy in a war so, for now, his attention was elsewhere.
Then there was Doux Antonios of Magadha who also disliked the Empress. While related to the Dynasty he was unhappy at not having a position on the Imperial Council.
Then there were the lower Vassals. First there was Countess Jira of Radha. Too weak to really be a threat the Countess could join a stronger Noble to add to the Empress’s enemies.
The House of Pala were always trouble makers. They never liked to think of themselves as having been conquered.
Then there was Exarch Danujmadhava of the Pala.
Luckily, while he had a lot of money and soldiers he was horrible when it came to warfare.
Then there was the Count Hektorios of Kotivarsa. A Count from a long line of Counts who, to be honest, disliked the Empress because he was a small fish of the Dynasty in a large pond. His family had always been small fry and he wanted so much more.
The last on the list was Count Nihalray of Gauda. Another member of the House of Bhar. Another small fish who could join others to become a real danger.
“I need to deal with the big fishes soon,” remarked the Empress as she handed the list back to one of her servants.
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